


Another First Time

by Tenderisthenight



Category: B.A.P
Genre: First Love, M/M, Multi, Romance, just some daelo word vomit i made years ago
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-29
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-10-12 14:18:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 30,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10492716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tenderisthenight/pseuds/Tenderisthenight
Summary: The moment Jung Daehyun met Choi Junhong,He was given a chance for another first time.





	1. Like the First Time

So here’s a story of how Daehyun and Junhong met for the first time. Which was on a fine spring day, when the sun had pushed the remnants of winter away slowly and Daehyun was a miserable college student because he was having a hard time with his family – we’ll get to that some other time – and was living under the mercy of his best friend who was kind enough to share an apartment with him.

Daehyun, of all means, was a handsome young man, capable of charming women with his words and looks alone, but after a particular incident, we will get to that, patience, he was reduced to a guy who would just hit it off with random women he met at the bar, and soon began his series of one night stands and short relationships which never worked out. It wasn’t like he didn’t want it to work out, he did, but things had their own way. Let’s just not label him as those miserable playboys because he wasn’t.

So, moving on to Junhong, he was a teenager, working hard to chase his dream, spending most time in the dancing studio, just dancing and learning rap because he loves hip hop. He was a shy boy, too preoccupied with his dreams and certain realization of his interest that he hadn’t even had the thought to try dating. And that changed when he met Daehyun.

So, here it is, how they met.

It just so happened that Daehyun knew Yongguk, and Yongguk knew Junhong. It just so happened that Daehyun came to the dancing studio one day to meet Yongguk and was introduced to Junhong, the teenager with sheen of sweat lining his arms and face, small towel around his neck as he smiled almost bashfully, as Yongguk introduced Daehyun.

What Daehyun didn’t tell Yongguk at that time was that he had been eyeing the boy the moment he arrived, because that lean body was moving so swiftly across the floor as he entered, arms like fluid, long beautiful – dancing legs, and stare so passionate that Daehyun was rendered breathless at the sight, eyes watering because Daehyun had never met someone so perfect at the first sight before.

And it was magical, for it to be Junhong, who just had to be Yongguk’s student who Yongguk talked about occasionally and Daehyun scolded himself for not listening intently to his older friend when he spoke because maybe he could’ve fallen in love sooner than that fateful day he entered the dancing studio. He would’ve ran to the boy that instant, and sweep him off his feet if not for Yongguk pulling him back to reality, asking him what he was doing there and thus, brought him to that moment when he learned the boy’s name, that sweet, sweet name that left a lingering happiness on his tongue when he said it himself as a greeting.

Junhong’s eyes gleamed when Daehyun had stared for too long, mouth agape because those rosy cheeks so contrast with the milky white skin was so mesmerizing that Daehyun had almost forgotten to remind Yongguk that Himchan needed him at the cafe Himchan owned which had just opened and that was the ultimate reason he was there in the first place, but at that moment, Daehyun swore his sole reason to be there was to shake hands with destiny.

Because that was where destiny had really begun for him.

It felt like the first time. The first time you ever had that feeling of adoration for someone, the first time falling in love, the first time of everything. Daehyun wasn’t sure if he remembered the wonderful feeling of falling in love for the first time because somehow, meeting Junhong had been another first time of falling in love.

And Daehyun knew he almost screamed when Yongguk had patted Junhong’s shoulder, smiling to let the younger continue his practice before walking out, dragging Daehyun who no longer had his heart with him for it had been stolen by Junhong the moment he had seen the boy stretched his arms in the air, gripping the empty air as he started to dance again.

Daehyun just had to cover up his sadness for not being able to see Junhong longer as he remembered the reason he was there but then Yongguk told him to come with him to see Himchan that Daehyun was reduced to an empty body for the whole day because his soul was out looking for Junhong. Not that the others didn’t notice, but Himchan had a busy day in his cafe, and Yongguk was worried but couldn’t do anything for Daehyun was unresponsive.

Except when his best friend Youngjae came and asked him what was the matter with him that he blurted he had found the love of his life – in which Youngjae had stared at him with horror for he wasn’t much a believer of love – and swore in front of Youngjae that he would get that boy no matter what it takes (but just don’t let Yongguk find out, okay?)

So Daehyun came back to the studio a few days later – after making sure Yongguk wasn’t there for the day because the past few days Yongguk had been there that he had to cancel his plans of seeing Junhong—and he waited outside for a while (an hour) in the afternoon when Junhong came in sight, exiting the studio, looking fresh, wearing an oversized hoodie which made Daehyun want to squish him and Daehyun strived to not let his mind imagine Junhong taking a shower after sweating a lot from dancing as he made it seem like he was just passing by when Junhong noticed him.

The boy’s cheeks were apparent pink as he returned Daehyun’s eager smile which he tried so hard to make it seem like he was passing by and was just surprised to see a familiar face.

It could have been just them passing each other for a brief moment with a simple acknowledged recognition of each other hadn’t Daehyun took the first move.

“Junhong, right?”

The boy looked at him, and his eyes were so round and they were shimmering that Daehyun swore the boy’s eyes were the eyes manga artists referred to whenever they draw.

“Um, yes.” Daehyun noticed the boy avoiding his eyes, looking everywhere but Daehyun as his slender fingers fisted his long sleeves. “Choi Junhong actually.” He said and looked at Daehyun briefly before looking away again, clearing his throat.

“Oh,” Daehyun said, staring at the tall boy in front of him, awestruck because if Junhong’s beauty was goodness then Junhong must be an angel, and Daehyun was certainly in heaven. But if it was a sin then Junhong was the devil himself, and Daehyun would gladly go to hell for him.

“I—I’m just leaving.” Junhong gestured behind him, looking all flustered as Daehyun cried mentally because he didn’t want their encounter to be that short. “Yongguk-hyung’s not here and if you want to I can—”

“Ah! I see,” Daehyun cut off, bringing his hands together. “I guess there’s no more reason for me to be here.” He managed a chuckle as he scratched his head awkwardly, and the lump in his throat wasn’t helping.

“Okay then, um, Daehyun-shi.” Junhong nodded, smiling shyly as he turned as if to leave before Daehyun stopped him.

“Er, well, uhh...” Daehyun bit his lips. “Why don’t I get a drink...? Oh—no, I mean, _we_ get a drink? You’re thirsty, wait, I’m not assuming you’re thirsty but you must be, hey, I _am_ assuming. But if you want to, you know, you can get something to drink.”

Junhong’s was blushing furiously, lips pressed together so tightly and then, he managed a chuckle. A very cute chuckle.

“Of course I can get myself something to drink.” He said, eyes crescents and Daehyun wanted to kiss his eyes only if that wouldn’t be socially unacceptable at the rate they were going.

“Oh,” Daehyun was lost for words, disappointed as he looked away.

“But yeah, we can get a drink.” Junhong hooked his pink hair behind his ear. “Together, I mean.”

Daehyun could have punched his way through the ceiling with the fist bump he wanted to give to God as he nodded happily, Junhong waiting for him to walk with him by his side.

And Daehyun was the happiest man in the world as they made their way to the cafe a few blocks away from the studio silently, glancing at each other awkwardly as Daehyun chuckled just to lighten the atmosphere.

 They took a conveniently empty table for two by the window, Junhong gladly sitting down because his legs needed rest after dancing as he set his bag on the floor.

“I’ll order then.” Daehyun said sheepishly because it had been such a long, long time since he had been on a real date, if it was even a date. There were countless amount of dates Daehyun had gone to but this one was terrifying in a good way and it felt like the first time of first date again. Daehyun was completely inexperienced, somehow, like what he learned from his past relationships were all gone and he was that kid who just fell in love and had only known the beauty of crushing on someone. “What would you like to drink? It’s on me.”

Junhong looked up with his round eyes, so pretty with the afternoon sunlight on his skin. “Anything will be fine.” He smiled slightly. “But I don’t drink coffee.”

Daehyun’s eyes shimmered with adoration he could feel it. “I don’t drink coffee too.” He breathed out dreamily.

Junhong stared at him, a smile still plastered on his face that Daehyun nodded, laughing as he walked to the counter.

And as Daehyun went to order, he looked back at Junhong, who had turned to the window, taking out his phone to check the time maybe and Daehyun wanted to beam at the cashier and say he was with that beautiful boy over there and wasn’t that the best thing in the world?

But instead all he said was two banana smoothies and thanks as he got his change and took his order on a tray.

As he made his way back to the table, his heart was racing so fast Usain Bolt would not ever catch up to it and he swore he was never that nervous around a crush before and Junhong was the first. Daehyun wondered what had happened to him over the past few years of being single and dateless. One night stands didn’t count because most of the time he was drunk and this was Junhong.

“Thanks.” Junhong murmured, looking down at his smoothie when Daehyun placed it onto the table.

“Er, I need to... excuse me for a moment.” Daehyun held up a finger as Junhong looked up at him curiously like a cat and it took Daehyun’s whole strength to walk away to the washroom, taking out his phone and dialling Youngjae’s number urgently.

“If it’s not important—”

“Youngjae! My good friend!” Daehyun beamed and he could hear Youngjae sighing on the line, probably rolling his eyes.

“What is it?”

“The boy I told you about?” Daehyun started, stepping to the side to allow a man to enter the toilet. “I asked him out and we’re at the Amore cafe. And shit, Youngjae, I’m so nervous. I’m fucking ner—”

“Wait,” Youngjae cut off, amusement in his tone of voice. “You’re nervous? Jung Daehyun is nervous? The infamous, playboy Jung Daehyun is _nervous_?”

Daehyun sighed as Youngjae laughed. “I swear to god Youngjae, help me.”

“Dude, you never had trouble hitting on your crush before, and it always worked out.” Youngjae said. “Just be the person you are, and you’ll be fine.” Youngjae paused. “I guess.”

“You’re right.” Daehyun nodded. He was the most popular boy back in highschool and maybe college anyway, girls swooned at the sight of him, even some boys too. “I can get him. I can do this. Why am I so nervous anyway?”

“Exactly, Dae.”

“Thank you so much Youngjae, I promise you I’ll buy you your favourite snack soon.”

“That’s what you say all the time,” Youngjae sighed, and Daehyun wasn’t listening anymore as Youngjae reminded him not to reveal his true self just yet. Daehyun was a cocky guy since high school and that resulted in him changing dates all the time. And Youngjae hoped that Daehyun wasn’t going to be the pervert he always was in front of the boy he was crushing on and not come back to the apartment for the night as he listened to the call that had been hung up too soon.

Somehow Youngjae was hoping this wouldn’t be a one night stand or something. Daehyun had trouble keeping his pants on at times anyway.

Junhong smiled as Daehyun sat at the table.

“So,” Daehyun started, watching Junhong sucking on the straw and he almost sighed in content if he hadn’t blinked. “You don’t drink coffee, huh?”

Junhong put down his drink, and swallowed before saying a low yes. “There’s this hyung I know who likes coffee though, he keeps trying to make me like coffee.” Junhong laughed as he made a face and Daehyun scrunched his face just to stop himself from pinching Junhong’s cheeks.

“I got a friend I know who does that too.”

Junhong rolled his eyes. “Ugh, tell me about it.” He looked out the window before slowly gazing at Daehyun and Daehyun melted once their eyes met because Junhong smiled, seemingly embarrassed like he wanted to hide somewhere and Daehyun would gladly let his arms be Junhong’s hiding place. “He recently opened his own cafe, so I was thinking of visiting sometime...”

And Daehyun wrecked his brain thinking whether that was an invitation or something as his cheeks practically burned but he swore Junhong’s blazing as the boy cleared his throat, looking away, wide eyed somehow.

“Wait, we’re not talking about Himchan, aren’t we?” Daehyun said as the sudden realization hit him.

“Oh, you know Himchan-hyung?” Junhong beamed and Daehyun was blinded of anything else.

“Yeah.” Daehyun laughed, finding it funny that they were talking of the same person all along. But it bothered him that even Himchan knew Junhong and he just met Junhong a few days ago?

“Coming to the cafe would be much more fun.” Junhong suddenly said and immediately turned away to hide his face from Daehyun as Daehyun had another realization.

Junhong wanted to go with Daehyun to the cafe. But Daehyun couldn’t. Not there. Himchan would find out he was hitting on Yongguk’s student and tell on him. He couldn’t have that. But that would mean ruining his chance of a confirmed second date.

“So I assume you met him through Yongguk?” Daehyun tried to change the topic and Junhong looked down on his smoothie as he nodded. “How’s Yongguk as a teacher anyway?”

“Yongguk-hyung’s kinda scary.” Junhong suddenly admitted. And Daehyun chuckled. “But he’s a nice teacher.”

“Oh.” Daehyun took a sip of his smoothie. “What is he teaching you anyway?”

“He never told you?” Junhong’s voice hid a sign of disappointment. “Rapping.” He said as he leaned in his seat. “I rap.” He seemed almost embarrassed t say it out loud.

“That’s cool.” Daehyun muttered and smack himself mentally, praying that he could summon back his cool self back in high school and early college days to win that boy in front of him.

“Yeah, thanks.” Junhong smiled, sheepish. “I heard you’re in college?”

Daehyun straightened and told himself to be as cool as possible. “Yeah. College’s fun and all, but being single doesn’t really seem to do it.” He found himself saying that idiotic statement but managed to look at Junhong suggestively, in which Junhong seemed surprised, drinking his smoothie quicker as he looked away.

But then Daehyun couldn’t stop himself.

“You know, not being single might earn you free smoothies after every dance practice.”

Junhong coughed and he reached for a tissue, and he was blushing furiously Daehyun rejoiced at the sight because from past experience Junhong was extremely affected by his not so subtle proposition, which meant the boy probably felt the same way he did.

“That’s... nice to know?” Junhong tried, forcing a smile.

“Isn’t it?” Daehyun grinned, leaning across the table to come closer, and Junhong backed away in his chair, his round eyes fixed on Daehyun, mouth covered with a tissue.

Junhong cleared his throat as he gathered himself. “Thanks for this, it’s nice.” He lifted his empty cup as he reached for his bag and then Daehyun’s mind went into a mess as he realized Junhong was leaving.

“Uh, oh, you’re leaving?” _Play it cool, Daehyun, fucking play it cool._

Junhong nodded, already standing up and Daehyun knew there was no way he could stop this beautiful boy from leaving which meant the end of a beautiful day.

“I’ll tell Yongguk-hyung you came for him today.” Junhong said.

Daehyun nodded absentmindedly, looking for whatever it was possible to say to make Junhong stay a little bit longer. “Wait.” He quickly stood up.

And when Junhong raised his eyebrows, thin pink lips so kissable at the moment it took all of Daehyun not to stare at it.

“D-don’t tell Yongguk-hyung I came today.” He said instead, and the heat rose to his cheeks, and he hoped Junhong didn’t notice him turning red.

Junhong scratched his head. And before he could say anything, Daehyun spoke out again.

“I actually came today to see you. Just that.”

And he gulped as Junhong stared at him silently, the bells ringing by the cafe door as customers entered.

“Oh.” Junhong managed to get out of his throat, eyes shining like diamonds and Daehyun dreaded Junhong thinking of him as such a freak. “Well, um, okay.”

Daehyun nodded shyly, losing all his playboy coolness he was channelling.

“I’ll see you someday then.” Junhong murmured, quickly turning on his heels and walking out of the cafe, head lowered and steps hastened.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is actually a repost from asianfanfics. I'm just moving them here. You can check the chapters out while Im moving them at aff and catch up there, i guess. Just a heads up, this story is 2 years old, and I'll be looking forward to updating them when I have the chance
> 
> here you go:  
> https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/871187/


	2. How They Started

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Daehyun and Junhong started dating, written so badly the author cringe rereading her past writing

 

“That’s it?” Youngjae asked, munching on his favourite honey butter chips that Daehyun bought him as he crossed his legs that were resting on the table in front of him.

“Yes!” Daehyun sighed, collapsing onto the couch still dazed from the doe pair of eyes and shy smile. “He was so, so beautiful, Youngjae. You should’ve seen him. He was lovely—”

“Cut it off. I don’t need to know that.” Youngjae rolled his eyes as he sighed when the commercial on the tv came back on right when the drama was at its best part.

“I want to date him, Youngjae.” Daehyun suddenly said, his stare distant as he looked forward and Youngjae creased his forehead as he gazed at his friend. “I want to go out with him. Be his boyfriend, you know.”

Daehyun wondered for a moment when he had last felt like that. And it felt like such a long time ago that that might as well be the first time for him to feel like that.

Youngjae chuckled. “Remember the last time you dated?” Youngjae kicked Daehyun in the thigh and the other yelped, rubbing his thigh, looking insulted. “It lasted for three days only you bastard! And the one before was one week. The other one, one day short from a week, another one before that, one fucking day, Daehyun.”

“Hey!” Daehyun retorted, feeling hurt. “This is serious! And telling me all of that was absolutely unnecessary okay?”

Youngjae scoffed, eating more of his chips. “Let’s see how many one night stands you had these past years besides your temporary girlfriends.” He started to raise his fingers as he counted and shook his head. “Uncountable, Daehyun. Uncountable I tell you!”

Daehyun sighed, Youngjae was really annoying, what with his unusual memory of Daehyun’s love life.

“Youngjae, you of all people know that all those one night stands and temporary girls didn’t work out because I was at that phase.” He lowered his voice as if someone might eavesdrop on their conversation as Youngjae raised his eyebrows. “Oh, you know!” He hissed. “I just realized I like men too other than women!”

“Oh.” Youngjae nodded, stuffing more chips into his mouth and putting the chips away when Daehyun tried to take some. “Daehyun, listen well and listen hard.” He murmured, earning the other’s full attention immediately as he placed a hand on Daehyun’s shoulder.

Daehyun stared right into Youngjae’s eyes, whenever Youngjae said to listen, that meant it was going to be important and he wanted the best for Daehyun. Daehyun knew him that well since they knew each other since middle school.

“I will only approve you going for whoever this guy is,” Youngjae said and waited for Daehyun to nod as a sign he understood. “ _if_ you promise me you’re going to be serious and try to make it work, take him seriously and that you’re not just trying to get into his pants once and then leave.”

Daehyun seemed hurt by the last statement.

“You got me?” Youngjae asked, serious.

Daehyun nodded, and then sighed. “How could you think I was trying to get into his pants only?” He muttered, crossing his arms as he turned his gaze towards the tv.

“Be honest and tell me you hadn’t even thought of banging him.”

Daehyun scoffed, but then pouted, guilty. “A few times.” And when Youngjae looked at him incredously he widened his eyes, betrayed. “Fine! All the time when I was with him okay?” he sighed and rubbed his face with his hands, it could be irritating to have someone who knew you too well after all. “But that doesn’t mean I won’t take him seriously.”

“Promise me.” Youngjae held out his pinky finger and Daehyun sulked childishly despite him intertwining their pinkies together.

Satisfied, Youngjae took his chips again and resumed watching the drama. “So, how are you certain you guys will have another date?”

Daehyun sighed, ruffling his own hair as he thought about Junhong and his glowing skin, white teeth and shining smile. “This is different, Jae. I can feel it. It feels like... like that first time you ever tried to go out with someone, you know. The nervousness, the thrill. And...He _did_ say he’ll see me someday. That’s a good sign, right?”

Youngjae shrugged and Daehyun knew it was useless to keep talking when Youngjae was immersed in watching his drama. He got off the couch to head to bed, where he prayed he would get an inspiration to ask Junhong out again.

“Hey, the landlord for the apartment you wanted called earlier today.” Youngjae said. “Said he couldn’t reach you and wanted you to call him back soon. I think you’re getting that apartment, Dae.”

“Nice.” Daehyun smiled, pushing the door of his room open, his day couldn’t get anymore better.

“Nice ‘cause you’ll finally be out of my apartment you bastard!”

Daehyun laughed as he went into his room.

 

 

 

 

So Daehyun had gotten his inspiration for next date by waiting outside the studio in sunglasses in case of Yongguk. It was the exact same thing he did the first time he asked Junhong out, but he figured it would work. And it was good enough.

Looking around him just to make sure there wasn’t anyone he knew, he wondered when Junhong would show up. And he thought about how it would save him the trouble only if he had asked for Junhong’s number.

“Daehyun-shi?”

Daehyun turned to find Junhong looking at him curiously, earphones dangling around his white neck, wearing an oversized white long sleeved shirt which suited him more than it should.

“Oh, hey, Junhong.” Daehyun greeted, taking off his sunglasses.

“Looking for Yongguk-hyung?” Junhong smiled, holding onto the strap of his bag, pink hair so beautiful under the sun.

“No.” Daehyun immediately said. “Just looking for you, actually.”

That sent Junhong’s smile away as red crept up on his cheeks. “Oh.” He bit his lips.

“That wasn’t creepy in any way, right?” Daehyun quickly said because Junhong’s smile disappeared and he was scared he was scaring the boy off since he had been waiting outside the studio just for the boy. “Because you were smiling and then you’re not, so I—”

“No, no.” Junhong shook his head, chuckling and his eyes turned into slits as his smile was now wide and his cheeks rosy Daehyun wanted to press his lips on it. After pressing them on Junhong thin, pink lips though. “That’s nice.” He murmured, looking down as he cleared his throat, shifting his weight from one foot to another.

Daehyun smiled, so glad that Junhong thought it was nice he just knew he could fly up into the sky and burst into fireworks out of happiness.

“So, uh, smoothie?” Daehyun rubbed the nape of his neck and the taller younger nodded almost too enthusiastically.

Daehyun was glad he managed to keep it cool as they talked in the cafe they went to before. Junhong was so mesmerizing he had to pinch himself under the table just so he could pay attention to what Junhong was saying instead of his lips and lovely eyes. Daehyun wondered how his smooth looking pink hair smelled like.

He bet it smelled like heaven, or flowers, or anything nice because Junhong was nice.

“I just...” Junhong looked down to his smoothie, playing with the straw as Daehyun blinked because Junhong suddenly seemed serious. “I just want to ask, if it’s okay with you...”

Daehyun blinked again as he drank his smoothie. “No, no. I’m okay with anything if it’s you.” And he placed a hand on his mouth, shocked from what he just said.

Junhong laughed sweetly despite him blushing too obviously.

“Ask away.” Daehyun murmured, mentally beating himself up because it was so not cool of him to say what he said.

“So, um...” Junhong looked away, scratching his arm. He seemed embarrassed to ask whatever he wanted to ask that Daehyun grew even more curious. “Girls? Or boys?”

And Junhong’s face went red as Daehyun took his time trying to figure out what he meant by the question.

And maybe it took Daehyun too long that Junhong shook his head. “It’s fine if you, you know, I don’t mean to—”

“Both.” Daehyun blurted, frozen in his seat because Junhong gawked at him. “Right now though,” _Fuck it, Jung Daehyun. He asked you which meant something_. “I like a boy.”

“Same, I guess.” Junhong immediately sipped on his drink, taking in the cold beverage so fast although his face was still red and avoiding Daehyun’s eyes.

Daehyun laughed awkwardly, scratching his head. “And oh,” he took out his phone and showed it to Junhong. “I really hate this phone.”

Junhong raised his eyebrows, his round eyes gleaming.

“It doesn’t have your number.” Daehyun muttered lamely, embarrassed as hell as Junhong let out an awfully awkward chuckle just to be polite that Daehyun felt like crying because he didn’t remember himself being _that_ lame.

He pushed the phone on the table towards Junhong though, and he smiled subtly as Junhong took it and started punching in his number.

And when they exchanged number, Daehyun immediately saved it as ‘Junongie’ with a lame heart beside it because he wanted to.

“Is Daehyunnie-hyung okay?” Junhong suddenly asked, and his eyes were hopeful as he stared at Daehyun for approval, cheeks so pink. “Or is that—”

“No, that’s fine.” Daehyun quickly retorted, liking the way his name sounded on Junhong’s tongue, liking just how casual Junhong seemed to utter ‘Daehyunnie-hyung’.

“There.” Junhong pressed a button on his phone, smiling sweetly and reached over the table to show Daehyun that he had saved him as ‘Daehyunnie-hyung’.

Daehyun loved how Junhong had his name so affectionately saved into his phone, and he swore that was one of the best days ever.

He noticed Junhong looking down at the table though, and realized his phone was lying there, screen facing up, and Junhong had seen the heart beside his newly made nickname. He immediately grabbed his phone, stuffing it into the pocket of his jeans, heat rising up to his cheeks as Junhong put back his phone.

“So, I can call you hyung now?” Junhong asked and his eyes were shimmering because he had anime eyes according to Daehyun’s eyes, and Daehyun wanted to sigh in happiness and just stare at Junhong forever.

“Sure.” Daehyun answered dreamily.

Junhong smiled, biting his lower lip as he took his bag, standing up. “I guess I’ll get going now.” He said and Daehyun stood up, already disappointed that the second date was already ending.

Junhong waved but then raised his phone in his hand.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Daehyun could’ve danced in the cafe because he was on cloud nine.

“Yes. Definitely”

And it was for the third date that Daehyun had texted Junhong for the time to meet up at the usual cafe, and he shouted in victory when Junhong replied with a simple agreement to meet up. With a smiley.

Youngjae had kicked him when he threw his hands into the air out of sheer happiness because they were having dinner.

And so the next day, Daehyun dressed his best as he sat in the cafe, sunglasses on because Yongguk could pass by since it was nearby his studio anyway and his heart was jittery from thinking of Junhong and his beautiful smile, pink hair like cotton candy Daehyun wanted to bite him.

So when the bell by the door rang as a sign of customer entering, Daehyun gawked at the tall boy walking in, lowering his sunglasses as his jaws practically dropped. He eyed the shy boy from head to toe, not quite believing what he was seeing.

Junhong was beautiful, as always.

But he was in a uniform.

_Shit._

_It’s a fucking school uniform._

“Hey.” Junhong blushed as he took a seat to find a smoothie already waiting for him. He set his school bag onto the floor as he took a sip of his smoothie, chuckling awkwardly as Daehyun only stared at him with his mouth hanging open. “Is something wrong, Hyung?”

Daehyun blinked, shutting his mouth as he took off his sunglasses to take a better look at Junhong’s clothes, because he still couldn’t quite believe it.

“You’re a high schooler?” Daehyun blurted out and Junhong froze for a second.

“Y-yeah.” Junhong nodded slowly, letting go of his drink to rest his hands on his lap as he stared at Daehyun nervously. “I—I thought you knew—I didn’t mean to—I mean I should have—”

“Whoa, wait.” Daehyun raised a hand as he chuckled disbelievingly. His crush was a fucking high schooler. A kid.

And now that Daehyun knew, he could finally see it. The youthful glow of the skin, the baby cheeks, the pretty lips. The eyes full of wonder.

Junhong was obviously a high schooler. A very, very tall high schooler.

“You’re still in school?” Daehyun asked in disbelief and Junhong seemed like he was about to cry but Daehyun didn’t notice it yet.

“I’m sorry, I really thought you knew and...” Junhong bent to took his bag and it seemed like he was leaving. “I’ll just—”

Daehyun grabbed his hand, panicking because Junhong wanted to leave and he couldn’t have that and Junhong immediately fell back into his seat from the contact, eyes wide and watery as he stared at Daehyun, looking like a scared puppy.

“Where are you going?” Daehyun lowered his voice, laced with concern. “Don’t leave.”

“But...” Junhong’s lips were trembling and Daehyun wanted to pull him into his arms and just cuddle the adorable boy in front of him, and coo at him and kiss his forehead.

“To be honest....” Daehyun murmured, looking down at Junhong’s hand in his. The contrast of their skin. “This is a surprise for me, Junhong.” And he managed a laugh. “A high schooler? You? Who would’ve thought?”

“I’m only seventeen.” Junhong replied meekly, still terrified.

“Seventeen?” Daehyun laughed brokenly. Life knew how to smack you in the face. “Wow.”

“Yeah.” Junhong breathed, staring at him hopefully.

“I like you.” Daehyun said instead, and squeezed Junhong’s hand, loving how cool and soft Junhong’s skin was and how their hands fit each other. And his heart thumped and his blood was a giant tsunami beneath his skin and everything else was pounding he might have a marching band in himself. “So, so much.”

He gazed at Junhong and Junhong bit his lips, face heated.

“And during the first time we sat in here, I decided I want to date you.” Daehyun watched the way Junhong tensed at the statement. “So I want you to know, whether you’re seventeen, or seventy,” Both of them laughed. “I would still want to date you.”

And then they went silent, hands connected.

“Are you sure?” Junhong blurted and he seemed so doubtful that a college student would still want to date him after knowing he was a high schooler. He had told his friend Jongup about his crush and his friend had told him that Daehyun could go to jail. Although that was meant as joke, Daehyun’s reaction earlier had him scared as hell.

“I am so sure of it, Junhong.” Daehyun smiled, rubbing Junhong’s knuckles to sooth him.

“But I have no dating experience!” Junhong said almost too loudly that he bit his lips shut embarrassedly as he looked around in case someone heard him.

Daehyun hummed. “Really?”

“Yeah... It’s hard when you know you like boys and being in high school doesn’t make things easier...”

“I’m all the more excited to date you, then.” Daehyun replied and Junhong blushed furiously, not being able to look at Daehyun in the eyes because he was too happy and too shy of a teenager that he merely stared at his lap. Daehyun only wanted to be the man who would make Junhong happy for the first time dating. “What do you say, Junhong? Willing to give it a try?”

“Definitely.” Junhong breathed, relieved.

And that, was how they started dating.


	3. Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oh god what was the author thinking when she wrote this

Obviously, it is a curious thing of how their friends found out the two of them were dating. Mixed reaction was received but both Junhong and Daehyun knew they had to tell them because if they find out some other way Daehyun was doomed and Junhong didn’t know how he could live with it. It was kind of a big deal, revealing the fact that they were dating.

“Thanks, Junnie.” Daehyun smiled as he took the cup Junhong had given him, filled with hot tea because apparently Daehyun seemed nervous. He pulled the younger onto the couch, kissing him instantly as he carefully placed the cup onto the coffee table.

Junhong smiled, as he wrapped his arms around Daehyun’s neck. “You’re welcome.” He said, feeling Daehyun’s hands pulling on his legs so he would be fully curled against Daehyun, on his lap.

“I hope you’re not nervous. Because I am.” Daehyun kissed him once and looked at him before kissing his pink cheek next. “But, I mean, our circle of friends is quite similar, so not much pressure on meeting new people isn’t it?”

Junhong hummed, brushing the crease on Daehyun’s shirt. “I’m still nervous, I guess. Yongguk-hyung has never known about us dating and I hope he won’t be too shocked when he finds out.”

“Let’s just hope they won’t be too surprised.” Daehyun sighed as he pulled Junhong closer to kiss him again, never having enough of those pink lips.

“Let’s not do that in front of them.” Junhong said, patting the older’s chest as he got off, walking to the kitchen instantly to arrange the food for the housewarming party.

Daehyun watched with content as Junhong disappeared into the kitchen, sipping on his tea.

They had been dating for one month, and a lot had happened, yet their friends had no idea about who Daehyun was actually dating. And so Junhong and Daehyun decided to invite their friends for dinner – they all had wanted to check out Daehyun’s new apartment anyway –  and let them find out that they were dating. Junhong had been particularly nervous since Yongguk was close with Daehyun and Yongguk was his rap teacher.

The doorbell rang right when Daehyun was about to get up to help Junhong in the kitchen. The younger ran out of the kitchen and almost bumped into Daehyun who was standing by the entrance, fixing his shirt.

“Who is it?” Junhong whispered.

Daehyun peeked through the peep hole, and to his surprise it was all of them. Yongguk, Youngjae, and Himchan.

“They’re here.” Daehyun breathed as he stepped away from the door and turned to Junhong, staring at the anxious boy for a second before reaching out to pull him into a kiss.

Junhong whimpered nervously as he gently pushed Daehyun back.

“This is it.” Daehyun smiled and Junhong nodded, returning the smile with his adorable one that Daehyun couldn’t help pulling him into a kiss again, and this time making the kiss longer as he tilted his head to deepen the kiss, his arms tight around Junhong’s waist.

“That’s enough, Hyung.” Junhong chuckled when he managed to make Daehyun stop, he knew how long Daehyun could go just kissing him.

“Fine.” Daehyun muttered, pressing his lips onto each cheek and an eye as he kept an arm on Junhong’s shoulder and reached for the doornknob.

They both took a deep breath as Daehyun opened the door to meet their friends.

But wait, that’s not fair is it not? Too soon? Before we get to that, let’s back up again. And so we are at that time when Daehyun was still on cloud nine at the thought that he was dating Junhong, the cute high schooler with dumpling cheeks. And of course Daehyun’s friends knew he was dating, but they just never knew it was Junhong until they met him.

Because Daehyun had kept the younger’s identity a secret after all. Well, Junhong was Yongguk’s student, and a high schooler and a minor. And Daehyun knew how much they had nagged him whenever he got into trouble and made mistakes.

Although Junhong wasn’t a trouble and a mistake.

“It’s official.” Daehyun said. “We’re dating, Youngjae.” He stared off into space, not quite believing the truth even when he got back to the apartment after meeting up with Junhong who turned out to be a high schooler. He was exhilarated by the knowledge of Junhong’s age, but nevertheless still quite pleasantly surprised because Junhong was his boyfriend. He was dating that boy. They were dating and it was crazy because Daehyun couldn’t believe he had someone who was dating him, like _date_ , he forgot what it meant to date all over again and it was like that first time he dated a person he liked and he woke up one day thinking that someone out there was dating him and it was weird.

“Congratulations.” Youngjae answered, not really interested as he stared at his phone.

Daehyun’s mind exploded inside him with his thoughts.

“So, um, tell me how dating goes again?” Daehyun asked embarrassedly as he sat down on the couch beside Youngjae.

The younger of the two stared at him as if he was stupid, putting down his phone. “Tell me what happened to the infamous playboy of our high school again?”

Daehyun blinked. “That guy in the class next to ours?”

Youngjae hit his head. “You can be so fucking stupid you know that. Don’t tell me you built that reputation of yours just to lose it once you’re in college?”

Daehyun groaned. “But this is different, and it has been a long time since I’ve dated and he’s so nice and sweet and he...” _is a high schooler and probably too young for me._

Daehyun left out the last statement, thinking it was not important to tell Youngjae Junhong’s age. Although knowing Junhong’s age made him feel old all of a sudden and Daehyun couldn’t help feeling like he really, really needed to protect Junhong now that they were dating.

He knew Youngjae had this aggressive side for cute things, and Daehyun couldn’t help but categorized Junhong as one of those. And besides, he was a high schooler and Daehyun wasn’t sure what Youngjae would think about it.

“Look, take him out for a drink tomorrow night with us and we’ll see how you can make it work.” Youngjae shrugged and he missed the panicked look on Daehyun’s face.

“I, uh, don’t think it’s a good idea.”

“What? You’re dating someone who doesn’t drink alcohol, fine, we won’t make him go drunk, you’d probably take him into your bed once he’s drunk anyway.”

“Stop thinking that all I want from this relationship is sex, Jae.”

“Is it not?” Youngjae raised an eyebrow, not amused.

“It’s a _really_ _small_ part of it.” Daehyun sighed and raised a finger. “ _But_ , making him happy is my priority right now.”

Youngjae laughed, shaking his head. “Gosh, I’ve forgotten how you can turn into such a hopeless romantic.” He stared at Daehyun and smiled proudly. “Hey, I’m glad you’re trying to make this work out, and from the way you like him so much I can safely assume you guys are the real deal.”

Daehyun nodded, blushing from the words said to him. “So, actually, how do I say this, he is not that experienced in dating, which makes me want to be more and do my best, you know, and we haven’t even kissed and I was thinking of the way to, well, kiss him, so maybe flowers—”

Youngjae groaned loudly. “Shut up, Daehyun. Let it go with the flow and you guys will be kissing in no time!”

The other nodded slowly, still thinking whether he should bring flowers for their next date.

 

 

 

 

So they met the next week, to go watch a movie that was just released and Daehyun liked how Junhong said he wanted to watch the new superhero movie instead of the new sappy love story and Daehyun cancelled buying flowers because he was afraid Junhong wouldn’t like it or anything or he would seem a little bit pushy for the boy.

“I got the tickets.” Daehyun smiled, showing Junhong who had just arrived in time the tickets in his hand.

“Oh, cool.” Junhong grinned, looking apparently nervous as he smoothed down his red sweater. “So I guess we’re grabbing the popcorn now?” He raised his eyebrows as he gestured to the popcorn booth.

“Sure.” Daehyun nodded and they both walked to the line that was queuing. Daehyun so wanted to hold his hand or wrap an arm around his waist or something, but he found his arm paralyzed at the thought yet he yearned to just touch Junhong in anyway because the boy was adorable, what with his round eyes checking out the popcorn sets.

“I’ll get this one.” Junhong smiled as he took out his wallet as they reached the counter.

“No, no, let me—”

“You got the tickets—Uh, set number two please.” Junhong said to the cashier who looked bored and used to their kind of conversation.

“It’s okay, really, Junhong.” Daehyun insisted as he took out his wallet.

“Hyung. I want to.” Junhong simply said, and his smile was so lovely Daehyun only stared, and watched as Junhong paid for the popcorns and sodas.

“That was unnecessary.” Daehyun chuckled as they walked away from the counter, already making their way to the movie hall.

Junhong gazed at him. “You’ll be spending a lot on me if I let you keep going like that.” He blushed and Daehyun had to agree with him although spending all his money on Junhong wasn’t a problem.

They took their seats in the dark hall, and Junhong made himself comfortable as the movie started and Daehyun was realizing he couldn’t concentrate on the movie because he wanted to hold Junhong’s hand or something, or place an arm around his shoulder.

Junhong’s laugh pulled him out of his thoughts and he must have missed the joke from the movie.

The older secretly glanced at Junhong, munching on his popcorn and Junhong’s eyes were shining from the light on the screen and he could just sit there and watch Junhong instead rather than the movie.

Junhong noticed after a few minutes though, and looked at Daehyun worriedly. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, of course.” Daehyun blinked repeatedly and shifted in his seat as he turned to the movie. And little did he know, the movie was good enough that he managed to pay attention for quite a long time before he started thinking about Junhong again.

He sneaked a glance and located Junhong’s hand, which was on his lap. _Come on, it’s so fucking easy just to grab that hand and hold it. You’ve done it before you can do it again._

Slowly, he extended a hand to reach for Junhong’s who was unaware of what he was trying to do, and Daehyun never knew how hard it could be just to reach for someone’s hand as he painfully moved closer to Junhong, his heart pounding so fiercely he could hear it over the sound of the movie and he was so close, he could just grab that hand and keep it in his until his fingers touched the back of Junhong’s hand and Junhong blinked, looking at him.

“Oh, you want some?” Junhong whispered, pushing his popcorn to Daehyun. “I didn’t notice you were out of popcorn already. I’m sorry.”

“No, no, it’s not...” Daehyun sighed as he realized he failed, and defeatedly took a handful of Junhong’s popcorn as he stuffed it into his mouth. When did he run out of popcorn anyway?

And so he thought of a new plan, as he resumed watching the movie where the heroine was dying and the hero was telling her to hold on, he was going to save her.

Daehyun slowly raised an arm, and moved it back so it rested on Junhong’s seat. Junhong didn’t notice though, he was too immersed in the movie.

Daehyun’s heart raced as he carefully reached for Junhong’s shoulder, and when it finally did, accidentally because Daehyun hadn’t meant to drop his arm on Junhong’s shoulder – he was an idiot, Junhong jolted in his seat, eyes wide.

He looked at Daehyun and even in the darkness Daehyun could see how red Junhong could be.

Daehyun forced a smile, he was so nervous, maybe Junhong didn’t like it, maybe Junhong wanted him to pull away but Junhong returned to the movie, slowly chewing on his popcorn as he slowly, so slowly scooted closer so Daehyun could hold him.

The building in the movie exploded as Daehyun felt his heart exploding too and he was scared Junhong could feel it because the boy was completely leaning against him now, and Daehyun could smell his hair and it smelled like fresh flowers. Daehyun swore it did. He was so tensed in his seat, but Junhong was warming up to him, relaxing in his arm as he slid lower into his seat just so he could lean his head against Daehyun’s shoulder.

And they stayed that way throughout the movie, Daehyun holding him close because he could, and Junhong feeling warm and blushing so hard because Daehyun’s arm was just a perfect resting place.

“The movie was good.” Junhong whispered as the credits rolled and a few people got off their seat.

“Hm?” Daehyun blinked, he wasn’t really watching. “Oh, yeah. It was great.”

Junhong looked up at him, eyes round as he smiled softly. “I’m glad I watched it with you.”

Daehyun stared down at him and those lips were so close, Daehyun was mesmerized. “Yeah, me too...” He murmured, slowly getting closer because he couldn’t help it, if he didn’t kiss Junhong now he would go crazy, he needed to feel those lips and he wanted to just hold Junhong close.

And as he shut his eyes, readying himself for what would be their first kiss, Junhong immediately pulled away.

“I’m sorry.” Junhong hastily apologized as Daehyun looked at him disappointedly, blinking like an idiot in the dark. “I—I just can’t—”

“No, I’m sorry!” Daehyun protested, pulling back his arm because he was stupid, he was being an asshole, not caring about what Junhong wanted. “I shouldn’t have tried to kiss you, I’m so so sorry, I’m an idiot Junhong.”

Junhong stared at him, forehead creased and his lips pressed into a tight line. “I’m just not ready.” He said, voice shaking slightly. “I... I hope you understand.”

Daehyun immediately nodded. “Yeah, that was totally my fault.”

Junhong forced a smile as he stood up and walked out of the hall, followed closely by Daehyun who dreaded that that was going to be the last time they ever meet.

 They walked out of the cinema in silence and Daehyun was terrified that Junhong felt disgusted by what he tried to do and he was praying to god that Junhong wasn’t mad or anything.

Junhong turned once they were out in the street, frowning. “I get it you wanted to kiss me.” He said, breathless and forehead creased worriedly.

“Yeah, but you’re not ready and I understand completely.” Daehyun swallowed, hoping that was the right response.

“It’s just...” Junhong sighed, and he seemed upset, and Daehyun was beyond terrified Junhong would leave him. “I haven’t had my first kiss.” He breathed out, and he bit his lower lip. “Yet.”

Daehyun remained silent. He should have thought of that, Junhong did tell him he never dated anyone before and was inexperienced, so he must had not have his first kiss yet. It was such a simple thing to be thought of and Daehyun was so stupid all he could think about was getting to kiss Junhong.

Maybe Youngjae was right, maybe he was only trying to get into Junhong’s pants.

“Shit!” Daehyun looked away, hands thrown into the air. “I am such an insensitive prick! How can I be so fucking stupid?!”

“Uh, please, Hyung—”

“I am such an asshole, only thinking about myself!”

“—It’s not your fault—”

“Goddammit Daehyun, you are going to hell for this!”

“It’s okay!” Junhong raised his voice as Daehyun covered his face with both of his hands, so disappointed of himself he wanted to jump off a bridge because Junhong didn’t deserve someone like him.

He felt a hand on his shoulder and when he lowered his hands off his face, Junhong pulled away his hand, looking worried.

“I... I’m just not ready for it.” Junhong muttered, his eyes shimmering and even when he was anxious he seemed beautiful in Daehyun’s eyes, that seriousness in his face so young and innocent and genuine he seemed unreal. “But I do want to kiss you.”

Daehyun stared at him, how could he be given such a blessing to have an angel standing right in front of him?

“And I do want you to be my first kiss.” At the statement, Junhong blushed, avoiding his gaze bashfully and those youthful cheeks were so fluffy and soft looking Daehyun was tempted to caress it.

“I’ll give it my best.” Daehyun said, determined yet finding himself nervous because it was Junhong, and somehow Junhong was that important thing you won’t screw up because you’re passionate about it. “Whenever you’re ready, I’ll kiss you and make sure it will be the best kiss you will ever have.”

Junhong gazed at him for a moment, and smiled appreciatively, and Daehyun laughed because he could be so sappy for the right person.

“Don’t outsell yourself.” Junhong chuckled as they started walking side by side and this time, Junhong took Daehyun’s hand, and let the older curled his fingers around his hand.

Daehyun blushed at the opportunity given to him by Junhong himself. “I’ll take you to the best place to have hamburger. Come on.” He said, smiling happily as they walked through the street with people, feeling warm because their hands were connected so perfectly as if they were made for each other.

 

 

 

 

“You’re right, this _is_ the best.” Junhong beamed after having his first bite of his hamburger and Daehyun smiled at his reaction. He could easily melt right there with Junhong being so cute.

“Told you it was the best place to get hamburger in town.” Daehyun laughed.

“How come I never knew about this place?” Junhong drank his soda, looking around the small restaurant. It was only a hole in the wall in the town, but people were obviously enjoying the food.

Junhong moaned delightfully at the second bite, closing his eyes as he chewed and Daehyun had to calm himself down because he could be so perverted and was thinking of the wrong things, and really, he shouldn’t especially when it came to Junhong because Junhong was the epitome of innocence in Daehyun’s eyes, and everything sweet and all that was nice.

 _God damn it he never even kissed someone_ , Daehyun thought. _Fucking stop thinking of inappropriate things._

They ate in silence, Daehyun watching Junhong eat secretly because he couldn’t quite believe someone could be so adorable while enjoying food, and those rosy cheeks all puffed out as he noticed Daehyun watching, made him chuckle.

“So, um, I’m sorry but, since you never had your first kiss... are you...”

“A virgin?” Junhong asked and Daehyun was kind of surprised that Junhong was pretty calm about it, but then Junhong blushed furiously as he chewed slowly. “I am, if you’re wondering.”

“Oh.” Both of them looked down at the table, too embarrassed to look at each other in the eyes. It kind of scared Daehyun that he might be all of Junhong’s firsts, but it only made him like Junhong more because Junhong was willing to take the risk of letting Daehyun be his first.

“Thanks for the dinner.” Junhong smiled after he finished his burger and Daehyun noticed the sauce at the corner of his lips and Junhong was so childlike, sitting there in front of him. “I should come here again.” Junhong said, and licked the sauce off the corner of his lips and Daehyun could have died at the imaginary scene flooding his head just by a simple action of Junhong’s tongue and he was upset at himself for being so dirty minded while in the presence of such a pure boy.

He cleared his throat subtly, heart pounding and blood rushing.

“I’ll take you here again happily.” Daehyun managed a grin, finishing his soda and eyes widening when he noticed that Yongguk was behind Junhong, having just entered the restaurant. “ _Shit_.”

“What?” Junhong raised his eyebrows quizzically and was about to turn around to check out what Daehyun was staring at before he was stopped.

“Don’t turn around. It’s Yongguk-hyung.” Daehyun whispered, staring at Yongguk, who was oblivious of the two’s presence as he made his way to the counter.

“He can’t see us together.” Junhong gasped, which surprised Daehyun because he didn’t know Junhong was also thinking of the same thing.

“Let’s get out of here then.”

They lowered their heads, as they carefully got off their seats and walking quietly to the door, careful not to draw attention lest Yongguk would notice them.

But Yongguk didn’t and they managed to walk out the door, running as far as they could from the restaurant as if it was cursed and laughed together.

“I just don’t want him to find out.” Junhong said when they were finally far enough from the restaurant. “It’s just that I’m afraid he would be over protective since I’m still in high school.”

“Oh, I don’t want him to find out either.” Daehyun laughed. “He made a joke about me not allowed to date his students back in the days anyway.”

“Really?” Junhong’s eyes were even more beautiful of crescents rather than the moon in the night sky. “So you never told anyone?”

“Well, I told my best friend about you, but only some trivial stuff.” Daehyun smiled sheepishly.

“I told my friend about you too.” Junhong replied.

“We’ll tell them the rest when we’re ready, yeah?” Daehyun asked, gazing at Junhong and Junhong looked up at the sky, youthful glow on his skin, pink lips smiling, and it was a sight Daehyun cherished.

Junhong blinked, gazed at him, gaze so tender and he nodded.

“When we’re ready.” He smiled.


	4. Nice And Warm

It’s kind of a nerve wracking thing, when you tell your friends you have a crush on someone or you are dating someone. Maybe it’s because of the anticipation of their reaction, and you definitely know you’re going to get teased, and they would be happy for you. And of course, celebrate you. So when Daehyun had his friends find out he was dating someone, he felt a bit happy, yet some part of him was quite worried as should they knew it was Junhong, they probably wouldn’t really approve.

None of them ever discussed about dating someone who’s still underage – in Daehyun’s defense, Junhong was turning eighteen soon, a few months didn’t make a real difference didn’t it? – but Daehyun still remembered oh so clearly when Yongguk was setting up his studio and he was saying he wanted to take good care of the students. Everyone knew how Yongguk took good care of people around him, and Daehyun knew he had beaten up a kid for trying to hit on a female student of his who was apparently deeply bothered by it.

The kid Yongguk beat up came home the next day with a few stitches and bruises, too scared to even complain an adult had beaten him up.

The memories of the story shared over bottles of beers had made Daehyun shudder in his bed at nights. And it was only the thought of Junhong that had really calmed him.

Two bottles of beer was placed onto the table by the waitress and Daehyun thanked her before he started drinking.

“So, how are you and your boyfriend?” Youngjae asked after putting away his phone.

“Fine.” Daehyun smiled.

Fine was apparently constantly thinking about that one moment he had Junhong in his arm. And always daydreaming about the smile accompanied with one dimple and those shades of pink on cute cheeks.

“Kissed him yet?” Youngjae asked and quickly corrected himself. “I mean, fucked him yet?”

Daehyun rolled his eyes. “He wants to take it slow, okay?”

Daehyun left out the part where he was actually surprised how he could be so into Junhong when they never even kissed. They had only held hands and Daehyun knew the first time he held a girl’s hand he was never that infatuated, missing the fingers between his and the warm, soft palm so much he curled in his bed because he liked the boy so much he couldn’t believe it.

Youngjae chuckled, amused that Daehyun hadn’t even banged his boyfriend even after two weeks of dating. He kept a record of it for future use. “I didn’t know you can take it slow in your relationship.” He said, quirking an eyebrow. “Are you thinking you’re still in school? Where they want to take it slow because most of them are virgins?”

Daehyun almost spat out his beer because Junhong certainly was still in school and a virgin.

And it was so wrong for Youngjae to talk about Junhong like that, if only he knew.

Youngjae stared at him and raised an eyebrow at the reaction he got but then Himchan and Yongguk came, greeting them as they sat in the booth together.

“Hey, you haven’t come by to have coffee at my cafe, Daehyun.” Himchan said as he leaned back in his seat as Yongguk ordered drinks for both of them.

“Don’t want to be forced to drink coffee.” Daehyun grunted, wiping lips with the back of his hand and Himchan laughed.

“I heard you’re moving out. Is that true?” Yongguk asked Daehyun and Daehyun nodded.

“Been packing up my stuff to move the whole day.” Daehyun smiled as Youngjae sighed, telling Himchan that he was forced to help even if he didn’t want to. “Hey, where’s she, uh, Ji Eun?”

“Oh, she’s coming.” Yongguk gestured towards the entrance and there she was, waving at them as she made her way to the booth, giving Yongguk a kiss before slipping into the seat beside Yongguk.

Yongguk draped an arm around her shoulder as she ordered.

They had been dating close to two years, although they had known Ji Eun for a long time already and Yongguk had told them he could feel it getting pretty serious, and Daehyun wondered if what Yongguk felt about getting serious with Ji Eun was the same thing he felt for Junhong. (Daehyun had practically imagined his whole life ahead of him with Junhong, he had gone as far as age forty before he couldn’t go on because it was too much. Junhong was too much.)

“You guys are early,” A woman said and Daehyun looked up to see Seonhwa, who was smiling as Youngjae scooted to give her a seat. “Hey, Himchan, how’s your cafe running?”

“Fine.” Himchan nodded, already having a bottle of beer in his hand.

She nodded, and smiled at Daehyun. “Long time no see you, Daehyun.”

Daehyun returned the smile, playing with the sticker on the bottle in his hand. Maybe one day when Junhong was old enough to get a drink he would be there at that very table and smiling at Daehyun. Daehyun imagined they would be drinking and laughing together with that group of friends and maybe after, they had a plan of their own after exchanging knowing smiles—

“Daehyun started dating again.” Youngjae suddenly announced and they all exclaimed in surprise.

Daehyun’s eyes widened, wanting to deny it because he was somehow embarrassed, but he merely kept silent as his friends looked at him as if he was some supreme being.

“Whoa, really dude?” Himchan asked, amused as he reached across the table to pat Daehyun on the shoulder proudly. “Are you sure this won’t be like one of those one week girlfriend?”

“It’s a boyfriend.” Daehyun rolled his eyes, rubbing his shoulder, wanting to spit everything out so much because he couldn’t contain his feelings but managing to keep it inside. “And I’m trying to make it work as best as possible.”

Yongguk laughed happily.

“That’s great, Daehyun.” Ji Eun beamed cheerily, genuine smile on her face. “Come bring him with you sometime, we’ll be happy to meet him!”

Daehyun chuckled awkwardly. Wait ‘til they find out he was dating Junhong, Yongguk’s student who was too young to get a drink at a bar.

“Yeah,” Seonhwa agreed, smile fading away as she tore the napkin in her hands. “Bring him here, we would be _so_ happy to meet him.”

Youngjae gazed at Seonhwa who didn’t take her eyes off the torn napkin in her hands.

“Hey, screw tomorrow, let’s celebrate Daehyun’s achievement.” Himchan said and ordered more drinks from the waiter who passed by.

“Seriously guys?” Daehyun squirmed in his seat. He didn’t know him having a relationship was such an achievement. _Yes, it fucking is because it’s Choi Junhong._

“You were so hopeless that we thought you had no future in dating anyone.” Yongguk said.

“Hopeless?” Daehyun scoffed. If Daehyun was ever hopeless then it was now, he was so hopelessly infatuated by the boy he was dating he could barely think straight.“Please.”

“Yeah, hopeless because you keep having those one night stands with random women you hit on in the bar.” Seonhwa muttered and drank her scotch.

Daaehyun quirked an eyebrow at her sudden change of mood and turned back to his beer.

And he ended up drinking too much for the night, resulting in him having a hangover the next day, smiling foolishly to himself because of how happy he was to know he was dating Junhong and to receive a good morning text from the boy.

 

 

 

 

“Hey.” Daehyun breathed as he found Junhong walking out of the studio after his dance practice which he had after school almost everyday. His heartbeat drummed against his ribs and he was pretty used to the feelings he got whenever he saw Junhong.

Daehyun loved the sight of the smile of recognition from the boy, and he liked how Junhong’s pair of eyes twinkled as he approached the older, skin glowing under the late afternoon sun. It was so unacceptable how Daehyun couldn’t kiss the boy before him, because it was all he wanted to do. But he reminded himself Junhong would tell him when he was ready, and Daehyun was completely okay with it. Whatever Junhong said, whatever he wanted was fine by the older as long as Junhong was happy.

They hadn’t met for a few days, because Junhong was busy with school and Daehyun was busy moving out and what with his classes and he missed Junhong too much.

“Hyung.” Junhong beamed, lips so widely stretched and Daehyun was delighted at the reaction he received having turned up unannounced.

“Fancy for some smoothie?” Daehyun asked.

Junhong sighed as they started walking. “I’m sorry.” He pouted, Daehyun wanted to bite him. “Got homework to do.”

“Oh.” Daehyun nodded as he reached for Junhong’s hand. His fingers filled the spaces between Junhong’s and Junhong’s palm welcomed the other’s, warm skin against each other. “You’re heading straight home?”

Junhong looked at him apologetically. “Yeah. I’m so sorry.”

“Hey, no need to apologize.” Daehyun chuckled and Junhong seemed so guilty he felt like he had wronged Junhong for some reason. “Let me walk you home.”

Junhong managed a small smile. “I missed you.” He murmured and Daehyun felt like wrapping him in his arms tightly and spin him in the air at the adorableness he portrayed.

But he didn’t, mainly because Junhong was taller than him and they were in public and he might just crush Junhong in his arms.

They walked calmly, Junhong’s home being a few blocks away as they talked about their day, catching up since the last time they met.

There was that feeling Daehyun had as they walked, hand in hands. Somehow it felt like he could stray from the path, yet Junhong’s hand was so real in his, it grounded him there, and it felt so right, so nice that it felt like that was the only place Daehyun’s hand belonged.

If Daehyun could describe holding hands with Junhong he would say; home.

“Your parent’s home?” Daehyun asked as they were now in the neighbourhood and he could hear a dog barking in the distance.

“My mom is.”

“Oh, your dad’s working?”

Junhong looked at him and smiled softly before looking away. “Dad left us for some woman from another city. It’s only me and my mom now.”

Daehyun squeezed his hand. “I’m sorry.”

“Nah, it’s okay, he’s a jerk anyway.” He shrugged moving closer to Daehyun and Daehyun watched as their footsteps matched. Their shoulders brushed, Daehyun liked how Junhong wasn’t bothered with them bumping against each other softly as they walked closely to each other.

“Does your mom, um, know, about this?” Daehyun raised their intertwined hands slightly. Because if she didn’t know, then Daehyun didn’t think it would be a good idea to send Junhong right at his doorsteps, in case his mom hadn’t known that her son was dating a man and a college student at that.

“Told her I liked someone.” Junhong muttered. “Hadn’t told her we’re dating and you’re a guy though. But she’s cool about it.”

“Are you sure? Because she doesn’t really know.” Daehyun asked, worried because the moment he told his parents he preferred boys, his dad went furious which resulted in him moving out of the house with his mom financially supporting him secretly, although she wasn’t fond of the idea that her son’s sexual interest was different from what she hoped for. She still believed she could make Daehyun like girls though, since Daehyun liked both genders, only to prefer male over female.

“What about your parents?” Junhong asked, lowering his voice. And when he saw Daehyun’s expression he immediately shook his head. “It’s fine if you won’t tell me, I mean, I’m not forcing you—”

“We’re not talking much.” Daehyun answered instead. “Especially my dad.”

The older didn’t seem like he would continue so Junhong nodded and stopped walking since they were right in front of his house. He stood in front of Daehyun as Daehyun took his other hand.

“I’ll make it up to you.” Junhong smiled, dimple on one cheek. One Daehyun planned to kiss if he was ever given the chance. “This weekend?”

Daehyun grinned as he took a step forward. “My new apartment. We can watch movies.”

Junhong chuckled then, nodded, bashful to even meet the other’s eyes. “Sure thing then.”

Daehyun remained silent for a moment, and Junhong slowly looked into his eyes, eyebrows slightly raised and pink lips slightly pursed questioningly.

And Daehyun stared into those eyes boring into his, and he realized he really liked this boy, yet he never even kissed him and never got much further than holdings hands. Daehyun realized it was the first time he had ever liked someone that way, and he was so glad it was Junhong. Junhong, the beautiful boy who was perfect in every way in Daehyun’s eyes.

“May I,” Daehyun whispered, and slowly raised his hands to Junhong’s the back of Junhong’s neck, thumbs caressing his soft cheeks, which was a red hue now. “kiss your forehead? Because I might just go crazy.”

Junhong chuckled as Daehyun smiled softly at the youth before him.

“Please do.” Junhong replied in a low voice, lowering his head towards the older and Daehyun shut his eyes, stepping closer and feeling Junhong’s pink hair between his fingers as he carefully pressed his lips on Junhong’s forehead. And he lingered, savouring that feeling he had inside himself, because Junhong made him feel a lot and it was wonderful, they were all nice feelings.

He pulled back, stepping backward once as he found Junhong fluttering his eyes open, lips slightly apart, eyes gleaming almost unrealistically under the lights and cheeks blooming red like roses.

Daehyun didn’t know how many times he had kissed someone on the forehead, but Junhong made him forget about all those times. And the only time he had kissed someone’s forehead might as well be that because all Daehyun had in his head now was Junhong and Junhong and the adorable boy with pink hair.

“I’ll call you.” Daehyun said as Junhong walked to the door, their hands slowly letting go of each other.

And when Junhong stood by the door, he unlocked it, and turned around to smile at Daehyun, waving slightly before walking into the house.

Once the door closed, it became awfully silent and suddenly Daehyun could hear his thumping heart. It was loud, and could only be caused by Junhong, Daehyun realized.

Daehyun walked away after seeing the lights upstairs turned on, stuffing his hands into the pocket of his coat, already missing Junhong’s hands in his.

 

 


	5. Silver Moon's Sparkling

“You know this is unnecessary.” Junhong said, yet smiling as they walked through the street. Daehyun had insisted he pick Junhong up from the studio to his apartment. “I can totally go to your apartment by myself just fine.”

“I just want to, okay?” Daehyun chuckled, squeezing Junhong’s hand slightly.

It was raining lightly, and Junhong loved the rhythm of their steps sounding against the wet street.

“Whatever.” Junhong muttered, and gazed at Daehyun. “Have you finished unpacking your stuff?”

“Nah.” Daehyun pressed his lips together. “I only need my bed and the fridge for now. But I arranged the tv and the couch because you were coming.”

“Oh, want me to help you unpack?” Junhong asked as they made a turn and Daehyun could see his apartment building now.

“It’s okay. We’re watching a movie and there’s no way I’m letting you unpack my stuff.”

“I don’t mind.” Junhong shrugged.

They walked into the apartment building and Daehyun held the elevator door as Junhong stepped in. Junhong stood close to him despite them being the only ones in the elevator and Daehyun loved it.

“It gets kinda lonely living alone.” Daehyun said. “You know, since I’ve moved out of my house I’ve been living with Youngjae.”

“Oh,” Junhong nodded, listening.

“But that bastard seemed happy when I moved out.” Daehyun sighed and Junhong chuckled.

When they got out of the elevator, Daehyun led Junhong through the hallway, to the door at the end and pulled out his keys to unlock the door.

He was pretty nervous as he let Junhong enter his apartment, since it was his first time showing Junhong where he lived. And his apartment was practically still messy despite his attempts to clean it beforehand, boxes were everywhere and there were still some stuff Daehyun wanted to throw away but kept forgetting to. Junhong looked around as he took off his coat, Daehyun taking it away from him instantly to hang it.

“Nice place you got here.” Junhong smiled.

“Thanks.” Daehyun answered and gestured towards the couch. “Please.” And when Junhong sat on the couch he made his way to the kitchen. “I have popcorn ready.” He said over his shoulder as he took out the popcorn in the microwave and stuffed them into a giant bowl.

He carried the bowl to the living room, and Junhong was resting on the couch, seeming to perfectly fit in the curve of the couch, looking for the remote. He found it in the couch and smiled as Daehyun sat beside him.

“So, um, what are we watching?” Junhong asked shyly when he realized Daehyun scooting closer to him on the couch. He let their knees meet and had to stop himself from moving away just because he was embarrassed. He was still not used to having skinship with the one he liked and kept having to tell himself it was okay and there wasn’t any need to be that shy about everything. Sooner or later they were bound to see the ordinary skinships as trivial. There would be much more important things they could do together and Junhong couldn’t even think about it in Daehyun’s presence.

“I picked a movie I know we both would enjoy.” Daehyun said, taking the remote that Junhong offered and turning on the tv. He leaned back into the couch and their shoulders were touching Daehyun felt serene.

Junhong immediately laughed when he saw the title. “Monsters University?”

Daehyun shrugged, grinning, appreciating the wide smile on Junhong’s face, loving how much more comfortable they were around each other now, and Junhong was really adorable when they got to know each other more.

Daehyun stared at him as he stared back, and Junhong blushed, turning his gaze to the television and smiling subtly to himself.

There were the littlest of things Daehyun was very much amused that he learned of Junhong. They were charms, and childish antics that made the boy impossibly a lot more cuter than he had ever been in Daehyun’s eyes.

Daehyun had learned Junhong had this whiny voice that he used when he complained or was upset by something. He had always laughed when he heard it and when Junhong asked him why he was laughing he would only shake his head because knowing Junhong he knew the boy would stop doing it if he pointed it out since he got embarrassed by little things easily. Junhong was also very particular about his socks, Daehyun had seen Junhong brooding over his ‘wrong’ choice of socks for the day and Daehyun thought it was peculiar, but cute.

Junhong gazed at him suddenly, and Daehyun raised his eyebrows. They stared at each other in silence, because Junhong wanted to tell him something, but was too shy and Daehyun was slow in figuring things out as always.

Junhong’s lips stretched into a small, shy smile, and he clasped his hands together as he twisted it around on his lap nervously. Junhong’s eyes were blinking as he avoided Daehyun’s stare now, lips slightly pursed.

Daehyun liked how pink Junhong’s cheeks could be around him, and then he finally knew what Junhong wanted, because Junhong moved closer and leaned against him sheepishly.

“Oh,” he chuckled, pushing the bowl so it rested on both of their laps as he stretched an arm out, wrapping it around Junhong’s shoulders as the younger leaned against him fully, sighing as he curled on the couch, pressed up against Daehyun’s chest.

“Thanks.” Junhong muttered, embarrassed.

“No problem.” Daehyun replied, enjoying the way Junhong’s body was against his, liking how he could hear Junhong’s breaths, and loving the fact that although Junhong was taller than him, the younger was capable of making himself smaller just so he could fit with Daehyun.

Junhong started eating the popcorn as the movie was progressing. And even thought of taking some of the popcorns and lifting his hand to Daehyun’s mouth.

The older was quite surprised, and he could see Junhong being nervous about it, and he chuckled as he took the popcorns into his mouth, as Junhong let out a small giggle, still tensed but Daehyun rubbed his shoulder, telling him he liked what Junhong did.

And after the movie ended, with the two of them still cuddling on the couch, Junhong slowly lifted himself, and stretched his arms.

“Well, that was time well spent.” Daehyun said, setting the empty bowl onto the table.

“Yeah.” Junhong agreed, and smiled at Daehyun. He took out his phone and checked the time. “Oh, look at the time.”

“Do you need to be home?” Daehyun asked, fearing Junhong had something important.

“It’s just that I promised mom I would be home for dinner.” Junhong smiled apologetically and Daehyun shook his head.

“Nah, it’s fine, just let me walk you home.” He made a move to get up to grab his keys when Junhong gently took his hand, keeping him on the couch. “What’s wrong, Junnie?”

The boy blushed at the nickname and bit his lips. “I uh... is it possible...?”

Daehyun hummed, urging him to go on.

“I just...” he started playing with his fingers as he chewed on his bottom lip. Junhong had a habit of playing with his hands when he wanted to ask for something, Daehyun realized, and he made a mental note of it for future use.

“Tell me.” Daehyun said. “Anything for you.”

The pink haired boy smiled at the statement, he loved how Daehyun treated him. Daehyun was so willing when it came to him and he appreciated it so much.

“Can you just... just hug me?” He shook his head immediately, face flushed almost instantly. “I mean, I hope it’s not weird, I just want you to do that—just for a moment if possible—Like, you don’t have to if you don’t want to—”

Daehyun laughed softly and Junhong shut his mouth, looking so embarrassed as his cheeks were a shade of bright red now.

“Come here then.” Daehyun murmured, pulling Junhong close and wrapping his arms around the younger, because it was what he wanted all along too, to just hold Junhong close and have him to himself for a moment.

“Thanks.” Junhong whispered, voice muffled by Daehyun’s shoulder as he wrapped his own arms around Daehyun. He blinked and looked up at the ceiling as he relaxed in the older’s arms. He never really got much hugs in his life because of his embarrassment towards skinship and the person he hugged the most would be his mom, but he liked it better how Daehyun’s arms just seemed to circle around him into some kind of a protective barrier.

“No problem.” Daehyun smiled as he felt Junhong’s arms tightening around his neck, and Junhong’s breaths against his shirt. He took in the scent of Junhong, and the boy smelled like the rain, somehow, and he liked it.

“I like you, Hyung.” Junhong said. “I really do.”

“I like you too.” Daehyun replied, tightening his arms and buried his nose into Junhong’s fragrant hair. “So, so much.”

“It’s my first time dating, as you know.” Junhong said, closing his eyes to Daehyun’s warmth. “And I don’t know, after dad left us, I just have these feelings that it is so difficult to trust people.” He sighed and Daehyun’s hand on his spine was soothing. “I just want you to know that whenever I am ready for something new with you, I will tell you. I hope you’re not upset that I am taking things so slow.”

“No.” Daehyun protested. “Slow is exactly what I need, Junhong.” He pulled back slightly so he could look into Junhong’s eyes, and he hooked those pink hair behind his ear as he smiled warmly. “Dating you makes me look at dating from a new perspective, and it’s really refreshing. It’s like the first time of everything again. I like it. I like us. I like you.”

Junhong scrunched his face as he smiled sheepishly, giggling when their foreheads touched.

Daehyun wished he could kiss Junhong at that moment, but Junhong was so pure, beautiful he didn’t dare, and it wasn’t about him wanting to kiss Junhong anymore, it was about Junhong letting him. Junhong taking a step forward for a first in his life. Which would stay with him long after that day.

“Walk me to my home?” Junhong whispered, round eyes adoring Daehyun.

“Sure.” Daehyun nodded, and when he wanted to let go, he found it hard to, and both of them laughed at the way they awkwardly let go of each other, which resulted in Daehyun patting his shoulder like an old man.

And the walk to Junhong’s home was calm, as the sun had set and Daehyun kept Junhong’s hand warm in his. Junhong told him about his test coming up, and Daehyun told him about his upcoming finals. Both promised to study hard and Daehyun smiled when Junhong told him he couldn’t wait to chase his dream after school.

Daehyun loved the little nothings Junhong could talk about as they walked, he listened and he only wanted Junhong to go on forever.

“Let me watch you dance someday, will you?” Daehyun asked. “I only saw you dance once, and it wasn’t enough.”

Junhong laughed. “That’ll only make me nervous. You know, you watching me.”

“Why would you be?” Daehyun teased.

Junhong shrugged, thoughtful. “I don’t know, I’m not good enough.”

“You’re good enough, trust me, I’ve seen you dance.” Daehyun assured as he gazed at Junhong and Junhong smiled appreciatively.

It was the sole reason Daehyun had his eyes glued on Junhong the day they met anyway. If Junhong hadn’t been such a passionate dancer Daehyun wouldn’t have watched and noticed the beauty he possessed and be so awestruck they were now dating.

When they arrived at Junhong’s home, Junhong turned to stand fully facing Daehyun. “I’ll see you then.” He said and Daehyun felt a little upset that their day ended so soon. He wanted to spend more time with Junhong, but Junhong was busy with school, homework and dancing and stuff.

“I’ll call you.” Daehyun said, expecting Junhong to turn away and walk to the door, but Junhong didn’t.

“One last thing.” Junhong bit his lower lip as Daehyun raised his eyebrows curiously.

The younger looked down at his feet as he became shy again, not being able to say the words he wanted to say. His cheeks were roses now and Daehyun could see him trying to suppress his nervousness. He felt Junhong’s fingers between his and played with it, looking at Junhong with adoration he never had for someone else before.

“What is it, just tell me, it’s okay.” Daehyun chuckled and Junhong gazed at him hopefully.

“Kiss me.” Junhong breathed so softly that Daehyun wasn’t sure if he heard him right. “Please.” And Junhong took a step closer when Daehyun was contemplating whether it was real that his dream was coming true. “I’m ready.” He said, swallowing nervously.

They stared at each other in silence under the now dark sky for a moment, both nervous and anticipating. Junhong’s eyes were full of stars and Daehyun was mesmerized, and he really, really liked the boy.

The request, or statement knocked the air out of Daehyun’s lungs immediately, he was breathless, speechless and heart racing faster than the speed of light if it was even possible. He should’ve asked Junhong to warn him if he wanted to try something new, so he could at least prepare himself because as much as Junhong had to prepare Daehyun had to too. He could maybe at least practice, or have a lip balm around because he didn’t have one now and maybe he could have danced alone in his room because now it was just too late.

Now that he was allowed to finally kiss the boy he had so much wanted to kiss he felt like running away. Not because he didn’t want to kiss Junhong, no, he was crazy at the thought of kissing the boy, but it was just that now that he was given the chance he was scared at the thought that he might ruin it for Junhong.

Maybe Junhong would be disappointed at him. Maybe he wouldn’t be able to give his best into the kiss.

But he promised himself, and Junhong’s hopeful and anticipating gaze was so absorbing how could he not do as he was told to?

Hell, he would roll around the earth if it was Junhong who told him to.

“O-okay then, well I... uh, I’ll just...” Daehyun looked around, not sure why he had to check whether there were people around, and he lifted his hand, not sure how to start but then took Junhong’s hands and placed them on his shoulders as Junhong was too shy, and Junhong laughed awkwardly as he found Daehyun’s hand on his waist, slowly pulling him closer.

“I—I’m sorry, it’s my first time so—”

“I completely understand, I’m nervous too, Junhong.” Daehyun smiled tightly, the cold weather made it all even more nerve wracking, and Daehyun’s fingertips were cold because honestly he had somehow forgotten how to kiss, and it felt like both of them were just about to have their first kiss. “But I will do my best.”

Daehyun could be another high school student, nervous and anxious to finally have his first kiss, and it was the thrill, the butterflies, the spark in their close proximity that Daehyun knew this was to be the very first kiss that would ever stay with him as a sweet memory, and beautiful promise of what was more to come with Junhong.

Junhong laughed, still nervous. “I’m so hopeless.” He muttered, gaze lowered and his cheeks were radiating red, lips stretched beautifully across the expanse of his pale face. His fingertips rubbed against the fabric of Daehyun’s coat gently and nervously and his hands might be shaking but it was Daehyun’s shoulders keeping him still.

“Uh, may I just...” And he lifted a hand to Junhong’s face as Junhong nodded, letting the older cup his face with one hand, the other pulling onto his waist gently so their body touched. And there were nothing louder than their hearts pounding in the night, Daehyun was overwhelmed, he couldn’t really fathom the important thing that was he was going to kiss the boy of his dreams. “Here I go.” He said, his lips a tight line.

“Okay.” Junhong breathed and Daehyun could feel it on his face as he slowly closed the gap between their faces and their lips were so close that Daehyun’s heart was pounding violently almost jumping out of his body.

The older tilted his head to an angle, and Junhong shut his eyes gently as Daehyun was so close to him now.

And Daehyun swore, there were fireworks in the sky as their lips gently met, his full ones against Junhong’s thin ones. Daehyun was seeing stars, sparkles and beautiful if it was even to be seen with his closed eyes, and Junhong was so sweet, soft, marshmallow and candy and wonderful he couldn’t quite believe he was kissing him because he was certain that was a dream, him kissing Junhong but Junhong’s lips parted a little and it was reality. Everything was real. Junhong, his lips, his breaths against Daehyun’s cheeks.

It was hard to break apart, Daehyun wanted for it to go on forever but that was foolish.

“That was wonderful.” Daehyun breathed dreamily as he slowly pulled back, letting Junhong breathe, eyes still shut.

“Thanks.” Junhong whispered, loving how Daehyun’s lips felt against his, because it felt so perfect, and Daehyun certainly did his best. And his pink lips curved and stretched into the most beautiful smile as he stared at Daehyun with shimmering doe eyes filled with newfound happiness.“I liked it.”

Daehyun smiled, and Junhong squeezed his eyes shut nervously because Daehyun slowly pressed his lips on Junhong’s again, in which Junhong let him willingly as his hands moved down to grip at Daehyun’s arm tightly, and finding Daehyun’s lips moving slowly and carefully and decided he liked it so much he would let Daehyun kiss him every day.

And Daehyun lifted his hand off Junhong’s waist, pulling the fingers gripping on his arm slowly, and their palms met, fingers intertwining and they moved closer to one another even if that was possible.

The older was beyond happy, he was elated, to be given the chance to kiss Junhong, and despite Junhong still being nervous, since his other hand was still fisting Daehyun’s coat so strongly, he let Daehyun do as he pleased. Their thumbs rubbed against each other, and both smiled into the kiss. Daehyun was just kissing him the best way he could, tenderly and carefully as to not scare Junhong off, so Junhong wouldn’t look back on that day and regret having Daehyun taken his first kiss.

He wanted Junhong to remember it like Daehyun remembered Junhong’s lips, soft, saccharine and innocent yet filled with affection.

“I’ll let you go now.” Daehyun said as he parted their lips apart, slowly opening his eyes to find Junhong with his shut, lips shimmering, rosy cheeks and just plain beautiful.

Junhong’s eyes fluttered open, and he smiled, satisfied. And his fingers uncurled, letting go of Daehyun’s coat and hand as the older let go of him reluctantly.

Daehyun could look up at the sky filled with stars, but he would still prefer Junhong’s glistening, constellations filled ones.

“You saved me from going crazy.” Daehyun said and Junhong laughed before Daehyun pulled him close again, only to kiss his eyes and cheeks because Daehyun loved his eyes and blushes, and everything that was Junhong.

He didn’t remember when was the last time he ever had such an innocent kiss, and the one with Junhong was innocent at its best, pure and dreamlike. Basically a really, very, nice first kiss.

Junhong was giggling, too happy and he knew he had to get into the house before he let Daehyun kiss him again because if he did, he wouldn’t be home for another day even if he was practically in his front yard.

“I’ll be thinking of you.” Junhong said, walking to the doorstep with quick hurried steps, smiling over his shoulder.

“Kiss me in your dreams.” Daehyun grinned and Junhong blushed, like he was caught red handed doing something wrong.

“I certainly will.”


	6. Comfortable

“So, I hang out with my friends at the bar a lot. Or some cafe in the day.” Daehyun said, taking out a lamp out of the box and tearing off the bubble wrap. “Most of them are school friends, some I met at college.”

“Oh.” Junhong replied, hanging a painting on the wall in Daehyun’s room. “What do you guys do anyway?”

He had insisted he helped Daehyun unpack his things on the weekend. Daehyun refused many times because he knew how busy Junhong could be as a high school student who had dance practices and rap classes, but Junhong lied about having no homework and Daehyun allowed him to help around his new apartment.

Daehyun thought for a while, placing the lamp onto the bedside table and plugging it in. “Hm, we catch up with each other I guess.” He said. “Himchan’s busy with his cafe, Yongguk with his studio, Youngjae like me. That’s the only time when we can talk about what’s happening in our lives.”

“Do you hang out with girls?” Junhong suddenly asked, and when he turned away from the wall, he found Daehyun looking at him, and he looked away, hiding his blush.

“There’s Ji Eun and Seonhwa.” Daehyun said, smiling because he liked how Junhong purposely asked the question. “Ji Eun’s dating Yongguk, and Seonhwa’s my high school friend.”

“I see.” Junhong scratched his head, opening up another box that was labelled ‘My stuff’. Daehyun was taking out the curtains they had just bought earlier that day, he checked– Junhong insisted on monochromatic design since he thought it would fit Daehyun’s room while Daehyun liked plain colored cream one, but Daehyun gave up when Junhong pouted – so he figured he should check out what was Daehyun’s stuff. “I think I saw Ji Eun a few times in the studio.”

He removed the cover of the box and found some frames, pictures of young Daehyun and even a child Daehyun standing by a landmark from another city and he smiled to himself, adoring the younger person he was dating.

And then he found an album, and he flipped through it, after making sure Daehyun wasn’t noticing what he was doing in case Daehyun was over protective of his past.

“So,” Junhong said, staring at the picture of Daehyun in his high school uniform in front of what he assumed was his home. Daehyun’s house seemed huge behind him, and Junhong suppressed a giggle as he thought about how it would be if Daehyun was still in high school. “how did you and Yongguk-Hyung meet?”

Daehyun hummed, looking up at the naked windows, and contemplating on how he should hang the new curtains. “Yongguk was a senior Youngjae and I met during high school. And oh, Youngjae’s my middle school friend, he stays with me until college. Funny how we stick around each other, huh?”

Junhong found more pictures of Daehyun in school uniforms, starting from kindergarten. It seemed like his parents liked taking pictures of his first day learning.

“So, Youngjae likes to sing, and Yongguk writes songs. And we just hang out a lot, I guess.” Daehyun placed his hands on his hips. How do you hang a curtain again? “We still hang out and now are stuck because Yongguk still writes songs for Youngjae. And we met Himchan when Yongguk went to college. They used to go to elementary school and middle school together, separated, and began hanging out again when they became roommates.”

Junhong flipped through the pages, Daehyun was a very handsome teenager, he realized, but now he was a young man, a bit wiser looking, and his eyes made it seemed like a lot had happened in between high school and college.

There was a picture of Daehyun and Youngjae smiling and holding up a peace sign taken from a photo booth Junhong knew to be at an arcade because of experience, and they were wearing school uniforms of a middle schooler. Junhong assumed they were skipping school or something.

“What about the others?” Junhong urged him on, distracting him from finding out he was practically fanboying over Daehyun’s pictures.

Daehyun sighed, giving up on trying to figure out how to hang the curtains for a while as he rubbed the nape of his neck. “Met Seonhwa when we were in high school, had a class with her and was assigned as a group on a certain project. And we met Ji Eun when we hung out with Yongguk since they met in college...” he turned and was surprised to find Junhong flipping through his treasured album. “Hey, don’t look at that!”

Junhong looked up and laughed because Daehyun was obviously embarrassed. “But I want to, I like looking at your pictures.”

Daehyun blushed, and he really didn’t like it when people touch that particular album, because his mom tried once but it was Junhong, and he didn’t dare take it away from Junhong’s hands.

He walked to the younger’s side as the younger sat down onto the floor, cross legged and he joined the pink haired boy.

Junhong was amused at the pictures, there were pictures of Youngjae and Daehyun singing on what seemed like the stage of the school hall. “I didn’t know you sing.” Junhong murmured, running his fingers along Daehyun who was standing on the stage in the picture. He gazed at Daehyun and Daehyun cleared his throat, shrugging.

“Well, I don’t know, it’s kinda embarrassing to just tell you I sing.”

“No it’s not.” Junhong chuckled, staring at the mole under Daehyun’s eye.

Daehyun looked at him and smiled softly. “Well, now you know.” He whispered as he pecked the boy on the lips, having Junhong losing his words for a moment before returning to the album, as they both chuckled. He really needed to get used to Daehyun kissing him, since he practically froze the moment Daehyun kissed him briefly when they were taking off their coats after buying curtains.

“You will sing for me someday, won’t you?” Junhong asked, looking at a picture of Youngjae and Yongguk sitting on the floor of wherever they might have been.

“Anything for you.” Daehyun said, having Junhong glancing at him to smile. “But not now, or anytime soon.”

“Why not?” Junhong pouted and Daehyun kissed his cheek. He _really_ needed to get used to Daehyun doing those stuff.

“I’m still too shy to sing in front of you.”

Junhong laughed at the statement, because after their third date, Daehyun was never the shy young man he was. He had grown more comfortable with Junhong. In fact, Junhong found out how much Daehyun liked skinship in a short period of time, and while he was a little shy about it, Daehyun had always assured him it was okay, Daehyun was comfortable with him and liked him too much to not hold him all the time.

Junhong had thought about the statement when he lay in his own bed to sleep and wondered how it would feel like to be held by Daehyun when he slept at nights.

“Oh, look.” Daehyun pointed at a picture of him and his friends gathered at a table. There was a cake on the table and Junhong figured it was someone’s birthday. “That was taken in the bar we usually hang out in.”

Junhong envied their friendship, they seemed so close with each other, and he was such an introvert he didn’t have much close friends. Jongup was the closest friend he ever had, and Jongup was enough for Junhong.

“What about your friends?” Daehyun asked as if he read Junhong’s thoughts, looking at Junhong’s eyelashes as the boy looked through some more pictures.

“I have one best friend I hang out with all the time.” Junhong said. “His name’s Jongup.”

Daehyun hummed, hooking Junhong’s soft hair behind his ear.

“We met during the start of middle school.” Junhong muttered, remembering the way Jongup had casually taken a seat beside him in the class. “In elementary school I was kind of a loner.”

Daehyun smiled at the smile on Junhong’s face.

“Anyway, he’s a very nice friend, I like how he’s kinder than most people and he likes the same things as I do.” Junhong found a picture of Daehyun and a girl he assumed Seonhwa on a couch – he had seen Ji Eun before anyway—in someone’s apartment, Daehyun’s arm draped around Seonhwa’s  shoulders. Beers in their hands. “We talk about animes and music a lot.”

There was a picture of Youngjae and Himchan drinking at some party, and then of Daehyun in some class, looking at the camera and smiling like he just recognized the person behind the camera.

They really liked taking pictures and keeping them, Junhong realized. Most people saved them in their computers or phones or something, but he liked how Daehyun kept them all in an album.

He reached an empty page, the album wasn’t filled to the end apparently and he closed it. Daehyun placed his hand on the album.

“You’ll be in here.” Daehyun said, and Junhong gazed at him, giving him a smile.

It was silent for a moment, and Daehyun felt warm happiness inside him by just staring at Junhong.

Junhong held onto the album tightly as Daehyun kissed him, shutting his eyes and wondered what memories of them Daehyun would store and keep forever.

And Daehyun couldn’t wait to let his memories be filled with Junhong, and their good times, because he could feel that Junhong would result in many wonderful ones. The ones that he would look back when he’s old, maybe with Junhong by his side as they recall their past.

Daehyun placed his hand on Junhong’s cheek which was a shade of pink, tilting his head to deepen their kiss, liking how much more comfortable Junhong was now compared to the first time they kissed.

He pulled back, and gazed at Junhong, who was sheepish, and pressed his lips on Junhong’s forehead and two cheeks. Junhong chuckled, eyes tightly closed.

“We can test the new bed now.” Daehyun whispered as Junhong’s eyes fluttered open and the boy was at loss for words. Daehyun laughed when Junhong practically turned red completely, looking away.

“We can start unpacking the living room stuff, I guess.” Junhong muttered, as he quickly stood up after handing Daehyun the album a little too hard that Daehyun laughed and walking out of the room. Junhong had expected Daehyun to make that kind of jokes anytime soon, because judging from the way Daehyun had acted always, he knew the man he was dating could be a little too playful and he was too shy and awkward of a boy.

Daehyun couldn’t stop laughing. He could enjoy making those jokes to Junhong again since eventhough Junhong become particularly embarrassed and shy about it, he didn’t seem to hate it.

The older joined him in the living room, running among the boxes and wrapped his arms around Junhong’s waist, catching the younger off guard from behind, kissing his ear repeatedly as Junhong giggled with red painted cheeks as he held onto Daehyun’s hands tightly.

 

 

 

“I want to tell them.” Daehyun said, both of them collapsed on the couch after unpacking everything and putting things in their rightful places. They had a few disagreements on where to place certain furniture, but Junhong always won because Daehyun couldn’t disagree with the cute pout he had. He reminded himself not to let Junhong use his pout as a weapon.

Junhong turned his head to Daehyun, and blinked. “I do too, but...” He sighed. “I don’t know, I’m kind of scared, you know.”

Daehyun looked at him. “They’re my friends, and yours too, somehow, I hope they’ll understand.” He said and exhaled deeply. “Although it might take some time for them to accept it, knowing them so well.”

“Do you think Yongguk-hyung will disapprove? I mean, he takes good care of me in the studio and stuff. He’s like a dad.” Junhong bit his lips as he frowned. “Wow, is this how you feel when you’re thinking of introducing your boyfriend to your dad?”

Daehyun laughed, reaching for Junhong’s hand and squeezing it. When his laughter ceased, he sat still, smiling. “So, what do you think?”

Junhong gazed at him, and then at their connected hands. “I’m ready if you are.”

 


	7. Friends

So now we’re back to the day when Daehyun invited his friends over to his new apartment for the housewarming party. But just for a bit, we still need to go back a few days to see Daehyun’s friends’ anticipations.

“You could just bring him to the bar to hang out with us, you know.” Himchan said, tapping his fingers on his beer bottle.

“Nah.” Daehyun shook his head. He had this nervous feeling inside himself about how his friends would punish him for dating a high schooler and really, he sometimes felt like he wasn’t good enough for Junhong and what if his friends thought the same?

“Oh, come on, I’m dying to meet him, Daehyun.” Ji Eun grinned. “We can double date sometime.”

“And you and Yongguk wouldn’t be the only ones who are lovey dovey in the group.” Seonhwa muttered and Yongguk chuckled deeply, giving Ji Eun’s cheek a peck. Seonhwa rolled her eyes as Daehyun sat rigid, because if only he could do that to Junhong in front of his friends.

“Why are you keeping him away from us anyway?” Youngjae looked at Daehyun. “You’ve been dating for almost a month, and when you dated that three day girl you brought her here on your second day of dating.”

Daehyun rolled his eyes as the others laughed, Seonhwa scoffing.

“Fine.” Daehyun sighed. “Housewarming party, he’ll be there.”

It wasn’t like he had just decided on that on the spot, Junhong and he had discussed about it and agreed to let them find out it was Junhong during his housewarming party.

Himchan and Youngjae whooped as Ji Eun cheered.

Junhong had been stressing about the most suitable day, and when they had decided on it both of them grew even more nervous, because as Junhong had said, it was supposed to be a day where Daehyun could hang out with his friends in his new apartment, and if they break out the news to them maybe the day would be ruined. Daehyun assured Junhong although the younger was still doubtful and scared that he could ruin their day by just showing up as Daehyun’s boyfriend.

“Oh my god, yay!” Ji Eun practically hopped on her seat. “We are _so_ gonna get him drunk and make him spill what Daehyun did to date him.” She said as she leaned on the table. “We all know the lengths Daehyun would go just to woo the one he likes.”

“That would be interesting.” Youngjae chuckled, chugging on his beer. “Since this guy over here seems to be head over heels for this person he’s dating.”

“Uh, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Daehyun forced a laugh, as if he hadn’t been babbling about Junhong all the time when he was with Youngjae. “And for your information, booze would be served, and sodas too.” He added, since Junhong and his friend, Jongup was too young to drink.

He sipped his beer and looked at every one of them. No suspicion and just plain excited.

“Ugh, you guys won’t be able to imagine him talking dreamily about how he’s meeting up with his little boyfriend after class.” Youngjae draped an arm around Daehyun’s shoulders as the other asked him if he was drunk already.

The others laughed as Seonhwa faked vomiting.

“Would be nice to finally put a face to uh, what’s his name?” Yongguk asked and Ji Eun quirked an eyebrow, realizing Daehyun never told them Junhong’s name.

“Oh, you’ll know when he introduces himself.” Daehyun waved the question away and thanked god when they moved to another topic of Himchan having a weird cross dressing customer at his cafe earlier that day and they laughed their heads off.

And so the day of the party, imagine their surprise when they found out it was Junhong. Because Himchan stared at them bewilderedly with his sharp eyes, Youngjae’s jaw dropped while Yongguk and Ji Eun were speechless and Seonhwa was only staring with wide eyes.

“Hey. Welcome.” Daehyun said, his smile too strained as he kept Junhong close to him. Junhong was tensed and he squeezed the boy’s shoulder to help him relax a little.

Youngjae was the first one to speak up after he cleared his throat in the silence.

“Um, Youngjae.” He said, extending a hand towards Junhong and Junhong took it. “I believe we met once before?” He raised his eyebrows as they shook hands while Daehyun groaned mentally because how come almost everyone already knew Junhong and he just met the boy a month ago?

“Junhong. And oh, right, yes.” Junhong blinked, timid and intimidated. “I believe we did, back in the studio.”

“Oh, right. Exactly.” Youngjae said slowly, eyes still fixed on the boy and things were so awkward Daehyun wished he could close the door on his friends and hug Junhong alone in his room.

“Junhong, hi.” Himchan was the next to try, waving at Junhong and Junhong managed a shy chuckle, lifting a hand to wave but Himchan pulled him into a hug instead. “I wouldn’t have thought it was you!” He beamed and Daehyun was relieved at Himchan’s reaction.

Junhong blushed and looked at Daehyun for a moment, smiling in relief.

“Hey Junhong.” Yongguk said, merely nodding as he placed his hands into the pocket of his jeans.

Ji Eun forced a toothy smile at the boy.

“Hey.” Junhong replied, biting his lips immediately, nervous as hell.

Daehyun looked at Seonhwa and Seonhwa looked away, one hand holding onto a pack of beers and another fixing her ponytail as she pursed her lips.

Junhong shifted on his feet, feeling the stares on him and he peeked at Daehyun. Daehyun knew the younger wanted him to save the moment, but Daehyun was clueless too. Although he had convinced himself he would be able to save them from an awkward moment, apparently he was failing when he was in it himself, and he kind of felt sorry for Junhong. For making the kid go through it.

Daehyun had thought of telling his friends by himself, but Junhong then told him he couldn’t let Daehyun do it alone. And Daehyun was touched by the boy’s concern.

“Well, come in then.” Daehyun said, moving to the side as he held the door and they walked in.

Himchan whistled. “Nice place, Daehyun.”

“Thanks.” Daehyun smiled, and closed the door as he watched them checking the place out. “Um, food’s in the kitchen.” And he pointed the direction to the kitchen and they all moved into the kitchen.

Daehyun took Junhong’s hand when they were the only ones in the living room and kissed Junhong who seemed anxious.

“It’s still better than I hoped.” He whispered and Junhong smiled appreciatively as he rubbed Junhong’s arms to calm him. “When’s Jongup coming anyway?”

And right then, the doorbell rang and Daehyun looked at the door. They walked to the door and Junhong pulled it open.

“Hey, you must be Jongup.” Daehyun immediately extended a hand and Jongup took it gladly, smiling and Daehyun was glad at least Junhong’s friend seemed supportive. If only everyone was as laid back as Jongup was. “I’m Daehyun.”

“Hi, Daehyun.”

“Come, we got food in the kitchen.” Junhong said and they walked into the kitchen where Daehyun’s friends were gathered in silence, Himchan already drinking his beer.

Jongup introduced himself to them and Daehyun was glad for the time given to him and Junhong as they wrecked their brains on what to do with the awkwardness filling the whole apartment at the revelation of Daehyun dating a high schooler and a student of Yongguk.

And after the introductions were over, they stood in silence around the kitchen island.

“So, we got booze, and soda.” Daehyun said, and glanced at Jongup who gladly took a bottle of soda. “We also got pizzas.” He added when no one really responded.

Himchan took the courtesy to check out the pizza as no one had moved, lifting the lid of one box silently while Ji Eun and Yongguk was exchanging glances, as if talking with telepathy.

From their expressions Daehyun knew they weren’t as happy as they were in the bar when Daehyun had told them he would introduce his boyfriend to them.

“Guys, really? We got pizzas.” Daehyun tried again.

“We kinda lost our appetite.” Seonhwa clucked her tongue, not looking at Daehyun.

He blinked, pressing his lips into a tight line. His friends could be so scary at times, especially when they were all silent and not talking to each other despite being in the same room.

“So, Junhong, how did the two of you meet?” Himchan looked at Junhong, smiling. Daehyun knew Himchan meant well, but it just killed him when he asked them how they met.

“Uh, we...” Junhong cleared his throat nervously, blinking. “We met at the studio.”

“I introduced them to each other.” Yongguk suddenly said and the others looked at him and he instantly lowered his gaze towards the bottle of beer in his hand, like it was such a wrong thing he had done.

They became silent again, Jongup taking a slice of pizza to eat and looking at them curiously.

Daehyun licked his lips, tapping his foot on the floor softly. It occurred to him, what an insane thing to be thought about, that it could probably be his last time hanging out with his friends or with Junhong. And he begged the universe to not let him make that decision. He wouldn’t be able to live if he was to decide.

“Um, Daehyun?” Youngjae looked at Daehyun and Daehyun was wishing Younjae would try to lighten up the atmosphere with his hyper side but he knew he was up to something else. “We need to talk. In private.”

Daehyun eyed the others, who merely stared into space and he worried about Junhong but nodded anyway. “Yeah, sure.”

He squeezed Junhong’s hand briefly, and led Youngjae out of the kitchen and into his bedroom, closing the door instantly because he knew Youngjae could raise his voice. It was possible, and he didn’t hope for it.

Youngjae had his back to him, and Daehyun dreaded what he was going to say, fisting his shirt as he bit his lower lip.

“God.Fucking.Damn.It.Daehyun.” Youngjae turned, hands in the air and Daehyun flinched. “Out of all the people, that boy?!”

Daehyun was taken aback, blinking and scared. Youngjae was furious. “Look, I know it’s crazy.”

“It’s not just crazy, you could go to jail!” Youngjae grabbed his shoulders and Daehyun swallowed a lump in his throat. “How come you never told me about this? He’s a fucking high schooler!” he hissed.

Daehyun nodded nervously. “I know! I know! That’s what I thought when I found out too!”

“And you’re still _dating_ him?” Youngjae eyes widened and Daehyun had been scolded by Youngjae a lot of times before, but he was never that scared of Youngjae before.

“Look, he just turned seventeen, he’ll be eighteen soon, and besides, it’s not like our age is that far apart.” Daehyun said and Youngjae closed his eyes, scrunching his face, displeased.

“Of course he’s _not_ eighteen yet.” He muttered.

“You’re scaring me, Jae.” Daehyun brushed his hands off his shoulders. “Can we just, discuss this like, a bit more softly?”

Youngjae cursed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Okay, look, I am not really against the two of you dating.” And Daehyun nodded, relieved. “But it’s you! Come on, you can barely keep you pants on! How many times have you done it with him?”

Daehyun turned red as he quickly denied it. “We’ve never done it, I swear!” He shook his head. “He has never done it either, and I told you we’re taking it slow—”

“He’s never had sex, what the fuck.” Youngjae whispered, staring at Daehyun like Daehyun was an alien.

Daehyun wanted to punch himself because he was the stupidest living thing in the world at the moment.

Youngjae stared at him in disbelief and Daehyun merely bit his lips shut in the awful silence. Youngjae seemed so disappointed, angry and worried somehow.

“No.” Youngjae shook his head, eyebrows furrowed. “No, I don’t like this, Dae.”

“What?” Daehyun sighed exasperatedly.

Youngjae threw his hands into the air, turning around to groan in frustration and when he looked at Daehyun again he was dead serious. “He’s a high schooler, okay? Break up with him.”

“No!” Daehyun retorted, almost disgusted by the suggestion even if it was just a suggestion. Although he knew Youngjae never really suggested, only ordered for matters like this, he wanted to think of it as only a suggestion and no one could tell him to leave Junhong when everything was going great between the two of them. “I fucking _like_ him, Jae. I told you I’m serious about this.”

Youngjae grabbed his shoulders, strongly and fingernails slightly digging into Daehyun’s flesh. “How do I believe you, huh?”

“I don’t know, believe me like I’m your best friend?” Daehyun rolled his eyes, pushing Youngjae away. He was a little angry himself because Youngjae was supposed to be supportive, they were the closest of friends after all, surely Youngjae should understand Daehyun.

“You’re only out for the thrill of fucking teenagers.” Youngjae narrowed his eyes and Daehyun widened his eyes, not quite believing what he just said. Youngjae could really be repulsive sometimes.

“No!”

“Virgins are better than the ones at the bar.”

“No!”

“You’re confused.”

“No I am fucking not, Jae! Stop throwing out weird assumptions!”

Youngjae rolled his eyes, crossing his arms as he looked away. He chewed on his lips, thinking hard about something.

“Fuck.” Youngjae rubbed his face. “Let’s get one thing straight, okay?”

Daehyun nodded, eyes shimmering with beggings of mercy.

“You will never bang him,” Youngjae said and looked at Daehyun to check whether he was listening, and when he was certain, “Until he’s eighteen, you got that?”

Daehyun nodded slowly and was somehow disappointed at the condition Youngjae placed. Not like he had a thought about doing it anytime soon, but well, he was only a man and he could imagine. And act. A little. Okay, maybe he wouldn’t go too far but only if Junhong didn’t want him to.

“Swear on it, Dae.” Youngjae muttered exasperatedly. “We know what kind of a pervert you are.”

Daehyun ignored the last statement. “I swear.”

“Swear on what?”

“On my life.” Daehyun sighed.

Youngjae crossed his arms, glaring daggers at Daehyun and Daehyun raised a hand hesitantly. “Say it.”

“I swear on my life I would never bang Junhong, not until he turns eighteen.”

“Because?”

Daehyun closed his eyes, sighing. “Because it’s illegal and I don’t want to go to jail.”

“Good.” Youngjae muttered and looked at him uncertainly. Daehyun stared at the floor, stuffing his hands into the pocket of his jeans as he pursed his lips.

“I don’t want you to hurt him.” Youngjae said in a low voice. “He’s got his whole future ahead of him. And you’re not going to ruin it.”

Daehyun nodded silently.

“Just because I’m letting it slide for now doesn’t mean I’m really okay with it, Dae. Truthfully I don’t like it. He’s a sweet boy, unlike you.” He pressed his lips into a tight line, looking away. “I know that. And I can see why you’re so dazed lately now.” Youngjae made his way to the door, and it seemed like their talk was over as Daehyun followed him into the kitchen after breathing out a sigh of relief in his room.

Although Youngjae had clearly stated he didn’t like it Daehyun still thought of it as something.

Himchan and Jongup were deep in a conversation while Ji Eun was patting Seonhwa’s shoulder as Seonhwa drank her beer in the kitchen.

Daehyun looked for Junhong and realized Junhong was in the living room, talking with Yongguk in a low voice. He hoped Yongguk wasn’t mad or anything, and if he was he hoped he wasn’t taking it out on Junhong. Daehyun would take it. Anything so Junhong wouldn’t have to feel bad.

“I never knew you would go for a boy like him.” Ji Eun said, looking at Daehyun, smiling softly and she seemed concerned rather than happy or disapproving.

“I... Well I like him the moment I saw him.” Daehyun shrugged, popping a bottle of beer open. He had confessed he liked someone to his friends a million of times before, and it was somehow so relieving to let them know he liked Junhong. It was different to say that he liked Junhong, it felt like eating a favourite food and finding it tastes different, but it was better different.

 “Like those girls you screwed?” Seonhwa muttered, wiping the corner of her lips as she glared at Daehyun.

Daehyun sighed as he gazed at Seonhwa and Youngjae tried to take her drink from her but she pulled away from Youngjae.

“Well, he’s different from the people you’ve been with, Daehyun.” Ji Eun looked at the pizzas, but she didn’t seem like she would eat. She crossed her arms, and looked at Daehyun, biting her lips. “Look, I know that boy, Yongguk told me about him a lot. He’s sweet, and innocent. Completely not your typical type.”

“What _exactly_ is my type?” Daehyun sighed exasperatedly because from what he heard from his friends it was like he didn’t deserve to have someone as pure as Junhong.

He knew he was a bit too tainted for the boy, but he wanted to believe that it wasn’t wrong at all for him to date Junhong.

“Slutty? Cheap? Easy?” Seonhwa offered to answer, pouring drinks into a glass as Youngjae took away a bottle from her hand and glared at her when she cursed at him.

Ji Eun looked at Seonhwa and frowned. “Daehyun, I like you dating him. I really do because I can see how much you like him but just—”

“Told him that already.” Youngjae said and coughed, knowing exactly where Ji Eun was going and the woman nodded, shrugging as she gazed at Daehyun and biting her lips.

They should feel uncomfortable talking about it but Daehyun figured they knew him too well to be so.

“Then I’m completely okay with it.” Ji Eun said, smiling at Daehyun. “You have my support.”

“Thanks.” Daehyun smiled in return, so glad that Ji Eun approved his relationship. It meant a lot since she was one of the matured ones, and Daehyun knew Yongguk influenced her over the time they were dating.

And then Yongguk went in, not looking at Daehyun as Junhong stood by his side. Daehyun looked at Junhong and Junhong smiled to show that he was okay.

“Hey guys,” Himchan suddenly said, grinning as he draped an arm around Jongup’s shoulders. “Look what I found, a new waiter for my cafe!”

They all smiled half heartedly.

“Oh, come on, it’s a happy night.” Himchan went on, taking bottles of beers and handing it to the ones who didn’t have drinks in their hands. And when it came to Junhong, he handed the boy soda and winked when their eyes met.

Junhong blushed, grateful.

Himchan raised his drink. “Daehyun, congratulations for you and Junhong and also for your new apartment.” He said and looked at them all.

And they clinked their drinks together, drinking in silence.

“So,” Seonhwa decided to talk, crossing her arms. “Junhong is it?” She eyed Junhong and narrowed her eyes. “Screwing around with college guys is cool for high schoolers, huh?”

Ji Eun looked at her with slightly wide eyes, biting her lips with concern.

Junhong turned red, not knowing what to say because he was scared and Daehyun knew Seonhwa could be so cruel and rude with people. She wasn’t like that when she was sober, she hid it well but from the pink shade of her cheeks Daehyun knew she was tipsy if not drunk yet.

“Does it make you feel excited that you can get a guy to go to jail?” Seonhwa went on and Junhong’s eyes welled up as he tried his best to remain composed.

“Seonhwa, you’re being rude.” Yongguk cut in, looking at Seonhwa with a stiff gaze, rather emotionless. Daehyun was glad for the save, but Yongguk being like that kind of scared him.

She scoffed turning back to her drink.

Yongguk chugged his beer and looked down at the floor.

The atmosphere was so tense, Daehyun never knew they could be that cold towards each other when the last time they met they were happy and drinking merrily while laughing with each other.

Youngjae looked at them, and cleared his throat. “It’s housewarming,” he said. “Shouldn’t we be getting the person who lives in the apartment drunk?”

Daehyun shook his head. “Fuck no, Jae.” He said when he saw Ji Eun smiling like it was a good idea.

“Hey, we have underage kids here.” Himchan laughed. “Can’t let them listen to Daehyun talking while drunk.”

Jongup laughed and Junhong quirked an eyebrow at Daehyun subtly.

“We can’t let them see us drunk either.” Ji Eun chuckled and Yongguk was smiling a little and Daehyun could feel the atmosphere lightening up a little.

“Okay, tell me what were the most foolish things one of us ever said while drunk?” Himchan smirked while Ji Eun bit her lower lip, thinking.

So it started to be a storytelling session, and suddenly everyone was spitting out the most stupid thing one of them ever did while drunk and everyone started laughing, Daehyun being glad things brightened up.

And then Yongguk was stopping Ji Eun from spilling out his secrets which apparently had something to do with his stuffed toy and then they were talking about Daehyun’s worst drunk episode, and Junhong looked at Daehyun, amused as the older smiled at him sheepishly as the worst of his drunken secrets were spilled.

And that wasn’t the end of their stories, and laughters because when there were drinks, and food and all of them, the night wasn’t much longer, and soon they were tired, tipsy and Ji Eun was yawning already.

“I guess we’ll head back now.” Yongguk said, draping an arm around Ji Eun’s shoulder who wrapped her arms around his waist to rest her head on his chest.

“Oh, yeah, okay.” Daehyun answered, taking the empty bottle out of Yongguk and Ji Eun’s hands and putting them away.

Junhong took away the empty boxes of pizzas while Jongup helped him throw away any trash into a plastic bag and Youngjae was trying to stop Seonhwa from having another drink as she whined. Himchan on the other hand was laughing at Youngjae’s futile attempt at stopping her from going at it again.

“Let’s just call it a night.” Himchan said then, smiling at Daehyun. “Hey, Jongup we can talk about you working at the cafe on our way home.” He pulled on Jongup arm and Jongup answered an okay as they walked out of the kitchen.

Yongguk and Ji Eun followed them to the door.

“Alright, I’m taking her home.” Youngjae put down the glass in Seonhwa’s hand and pulled her arm around his shoulders to support her as they walked out of the kitchen. Seonhwa mumbled something and Youngjae snapped slightly, and Daehyun smiled at his friends’ behaviour, although it wasn’t like it was rare for them to be like that.

Daehyun caught Junhong’s gaze, and smiled briefly before both of them went to the door to bid their friends goodbye.

“Hey, thanks for everything!” Ji Eun shouted over her shoulder as she was dragged out, waving her hand in the air. “See you guys.”

“See you.” Daehyun replied.

“Take care of Junhong, you bastard.” Himchan laughed, patting Daehyun on the shoulder before walking out the door.

“I’ll see you in school.” Junhong said to Jongup who waved before disappearing with Himchan.

“I don’t feel so good.” Seonhwa covered her mouth with her hand as Youngjae helped her through the door.

Daehyun watched with concern as the two walked away after bidding goodbye, Youngjae almost falling when Seonhwa tripped.

And Daehyun and Junhong waited as the last of their friends left, standing there at the door in silence and lingering smiles.

“Well, we got over that.” Daehyun puffed his cheeks, relieved the night went from bad to usual. He looked at Junhong and the boy smiled at him softly.

“Your friends are really fun people.” Junhong said, walking into the kitchen as Daehyun closed the door.

“Well, it wasn’t that bad, wasn’t it?” Daehyun found Junhong cleaning up in the kitchen, practically throwing things into the plastic bag, turning away from the older. He stared amusedly when Junhong bent down to pick up an empty can that rolled off onto the floor.

“I guess.” Junhong looked at him as he walked towards him. “Seonhwa noona scared me at first.”

Daehyun placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed comfortingly. “She’s like that. But she’s actually really nice. I was scared of her at first too.”

Junhong smiled as Daehyun pressed his lips on his cheek.

“Go sit on the couch, I’ll take out the trash.” Daehyun said, putting the rest of the trash into the bag and tying the bag up as Junhong walked into the living room silently, sighing when he lay on the couch.

And after Daehyun took out the trash, he found Junhong staring at the ceiling, frowning, thinking hard about something. He sat on the couch, beside Junhong’s long legs and took his hand.

“Something wrong?” Daehyun asked, concerned as Junhong pulled away his hand to scratch his head. “What did Yongguk say to you?”

Junhong looked at him, quiet, and bit his lips. “He just told me to be careful.” He murmured. “Said you’re a pervert who can’t stand not having sex.”

And he laughed as Daehyun pinched his cheek, couldn’t help but find the boy lying on the couch so adorable.

“Oh, stop it!” Junhong squealed when he was tickled, Daehyun kissing his cheek as he laughed, the two of them becoming entangled on the couch as their foreheads pressed against each other.

Their laughter died down slowly as they lay there, smiling, breathing in the same rhythm. Daehyun ran his fingers through Junhong’s hair, and chuckled when Junhong pulled him closer shyly by the shirt, not missing the pink cheeks.

“You’ve never told me though.” Junhong whispered, lifting his head to lie on Daehyun’s shoulder. “About you having too many one night stands because you were going through a phase.”

Daehyun blinked, his fingers stopped moving through the pink hair and he sighed. “It was in the past. I didn’t think it mattered now that we’re dating.”

Junhong looked at Daehyun, his doe pair of eyes staring at him so child like. “Of course it does.” He protested.

“Why does it matter?” Daehyun creased his forehead. “Is it because I’ve slept with a lot of people before and you haven’t?”

Junhong closed his eyes, tightening his arms around Daehyun to hide his face. “I don’t know. I know it doesn’t matter. But...” he sighed and Daehyun planted a kiss on his head. “ugh I don’t know, Hyung. You can practically get some other people who are experienced easily and date them, but me, I—”

“I date you because I like you.” Daehyun said. “And those people, god knows I regret those one night stands so much because it makes me feel so inadequate to be with you. Like I’m such a dirty pair of shoes that you won’t put on to walk in. Or something like that.”

Junhong didn’t say anything, just placing a hand on Daehyun’s chest and drawing a circle.

“Junhong, dating you feels like the first time of everything again.” Daehyun tightened his hold around Junhong and Junhong shifted, just so he could feel Daehyun’s heartbeat against him. “And I am so grateful for that. So grateful that you let me have my firsts again. With you.”

The younger still didn’t say anything and Daehyun grew worried.

“Are you okay, love?” Daehyun asked, letting the nickname out because Junhong was sweet like love. He could always see a small tug of Junhong’s lips whenever he called him that. It was a spontaneous nickname he had called the boy one day, and it stuck because it fitted him too well.

“Promise me,” Junhong whispered. “you won’t feel that way ever again. That dirty pair of shoes thing.” He pulled himself up slightly so he could gaze at Daehyun. “And promise me, that you will never be in that kind of phase again.”

Daehyun smiled. “Why would I? I already have you.” He pulled Junhong closer and kissed him on the lips, liking how Junhong had little taste of soda on him.

“Hyung?” Junhong called when they pulled away, and now he was frowning.

“Yeah?”

Junhong bit his lips, hesitant and Daehyun rubbed his arm soothingly to urge him to go on.

“After the initial reaction from our friends, I couldn’t help but...” He looked away and sighed. “Worry about my mom.”

Daehyun raised his eyebrows, worried.

“I... I want to tell her. I mean, your friends already know that you like boys and have no problem with it. But my mom... she doesn’t know. She doesn’t know anything about you being a guy, and that you’re a college student and—”

Daehyun shut him up with his lips. “Then don’t rush to tell her.” He murmured.

“But I want to. I _need_ to. She’s my mom. My best friend, Hyung.”

The older thought for a while, combing the boy’s hair with his fingers. “Well, when do you want to tell her?”

Junhong shrugged. “Soon.” He sighed after contemplating for a while. He pulled away from Daehyun to sit up and the older pulled himself up too, noticing the concern on the younger’s face, making him frown.

“Let me walk you home.”

Junhong shook his head. “Can I stay?” He asked instead and took Daehyun’s hand. “Can I stay for the night?”

“Your mom won’t be worried?”

“No. I’ll text her I’m staying with a friend. She’ll be cool, slept at Jongup’s a lot of times before anyway.”

“Alright then, but, are you really sure?”

“Yeah.” Junhong nodded hastily. “I mean, this couch ain’t that bad—”

“Hey, who said you’re sleeping on the couch?”

Junhong gaped at him, blushing instantly.

“I won’t do anything to you.” Daehyun laughed, loving how childish Junhong could be. “You don’t mind though, right, sleeping in the same bed as I am?”

The younger shook his head yet avoided Daehyun’s eyes.

Daehyun placed a hand on his thigh and nodded. “I’ll go take out what you can wear.”

And before Daehyun could stand up Junhong pulled him into a hug, burying his face into Daehyun’s shoulder. Daehyun chuckled, Junhong was such a baby at times and he pulled back slightly to kiss him on the lips.

Junhong stiffened, but relaxed immediately.

Daehyun let his lips move slowly against Junhong’s, his hand now resting on Junhong’s waist and he rubbed the younger’s side to coax him to relax as he tilted his head, deepening the kiss. Junhong’s hands were lost before they found their place on Daehyun’s shoulders, curling his fingers into Daehyun’s shirt, and then wrapping an arm around Daehyun’s neck to pull him closer.

The older could feel the boy responding to his moving lips, and smiled against him as they were now in sync, hand on Junhong’s bony knee, squeezing slightly.

He had to slightly push Junhong back to let the younger breathe as Junhong had seemed to have forgotten to, and chuckled slightly as he pressed his lips on Junhong’s cheek, down to his jaw. Junhong’s scent filled his nostrils and he inhaled, savouring whatever it was that was Junhong.

“We can bring this to bed.” Daehyun grinned, breathless and Junhong blushed yet smiled amusedly, before lightly pushing him by the chest as he laughed, getting off the couch immediately and walking into the bathroom.

Daehyun went into his room to take out whatever Junhong could wear for the night, and punched himself mentally for thinking that it would do to make Junhong not wear anything in the bed.

He took out an oversized t shirt though, and when Junhong came out of the bathroom he handed it to him.

“There’s an extra toothbrush in medicine cabinet.” Daehyun said and Junhong nodded, already walking back to the bathroom. “And hey, you can change in front of me, I won’t mind.”

Junhong looked at him over his shoulder and scoffed. “Of course you won’t mind.” He said before closing the bathroom door and Daehyun laughed to himself.

Daehyun changed and after Junhong went out of the bathroom he walked in to wash his face and brush his teeth, setting his brush into a small cup by the mirror, beside Junhong’s.

When he walked out the bathroom he found Junhong already lying on the bed, on his side with his back facing Daehyun. He smiled at the sight, and crawled under the covers as he pulled himself beside Junhong. He reached for the lamp on the bedside table and switched it off.

The room became dark, and somehow so much quieter.

“Thanks for today, Hyung.” Junhong murmured, finding Daehyun’s arm snaking around his waist, pressing Junhong against himself. Daehyun was warm against his back, and he curled himself to make himself fit perfectly with Daehyun. He could feel the older’s breathing and heartbeat against his back and he blushed red. “Hey, can I tell you a secret?”

Daehyun brushed away the strands of hair that was covering Junhong’s face. “Yeah? What is it?”

“This is my first time sleeping with someone else on the same bed.”

Daehyun chuckled, amused as he planted a kiss on Junhong’s cheek before resting his head on Junhong’s shoulder. “Really? What about Jongup?”

“He let me sleep on the floor.” Junhong said, and Daehyun could hear him smile in the darkness.

“Does it make you nervous?”

Junhong turned slightly so he could look at Daehyun, his eyes already adjusting in the darkness, and he chuckled when his shoulder bumped at Daehyun’s face, Daehyun’s arms now at a weird angle and they found it funny as the dark room was filled with laughter.

“Yes, it makes me nervous.” Junhong answered, and he was smiling sweetly in the older’s arms Daehyun thought he had never seen such a beautiful sight. “But it’s good nervous, you know.”

The older hummed, propping himself up on his elbow and rubbing Junhong’s bare arm, thumb drawing soothing circles. He was sure if the lights were on he would be able to see those rosy cheeks. “I want to do this. This thing, snuggling, I mean. A lot. With you. Would that be okay?”

Junhong blinked, and smiled when he felt Daehyun closing the gap between their faces, hand immediately appearing from under the covers to cup Daehyun’s cheek as their lips met.

“You can snuggle me all you want.” Junhong murmured, turning away already, and closing his eyes as he felt Daehyun wrapping his arm around his torso again.

“Goodnight, love.” Daehyun whispered, and Junhong hummed a reply.

Daehyun scooted closer, and kissed his shoulder once, twice, thrice before nuzzling his shoulder, inhaling the scent of Junhong mixed with his own since Junhong was wearing his shirt.

And Daehyun had never had such happiness filled dreams before as he slept.

 

 


	8. Two Mornings

“Hey, slow down, you’ll trip.” Youngjae called out as Seonhwa staggered through the empty street in the night. He ran to her rescue when she almost tripped, propping her up as she mumbled something he couldn’t make out. “Come on, we’re getting you home.” He struggled to lift her up but she was sagging down in his hold.

“I don’t want to go home.” She whined, so drunk she couldn’t stand without Youngjae holding her now.

“Then where do you want to go, huh?” He sighed exasperatedly, pulling her up but finding she was putting weight in herself so she would fall but he couldn’t let that happen, he somehow didn’t want her to ruin her dress.

“Nowhere!” She shouted, slapping away Youngjae’s hand and falling onto the ground, sitting there as she hiccupped.

“Fuck.” Youngjae cursed, trying to grab a hold of her but she parried away his hands.

“Leave me alone!” She snapped, head drooped low and Youngjae couldn’t look at her in the face. “Just... Just...” A hiccup. “Just leave me alone...”

Youngjae wondered why he had offered taking Seonhwa home when he could have left her at Daehyun’s apartment. Would have saved him all that trouble.

“Fuck this life, man.” Seonhwa suddenly cried out, and then did Youngjae realize, she was crying.

“Well, we’ll get you a cab, come on up.”

“No!” She retorted, sobbing and hiccupping. Youngjae squatted beside her and he found black tears streaming down her pale face. She wiped them away with the back of her hand, but they kept on rolling down her cheeks.

Youngjae frowned in concern, creasing his forehead as she let out a loud sob.

“He just _has to_ date that _fucking kid_!” She cried. “He’s a fucking high schooler! Is he sick?!”

Youngjae watched the streets, no sign of a cab anywhere. He bit his lips in worries, Seonhwa needed to be put to bed. And her flat was three blocks further than his apartment.

“I know how stupidly perverted he could be, but...He could have dated a girl, god damn it! A slutty high schooler who’s a whore! Who’s not a virgin but claim she is so she could win his heart by faking innocence!”

Youngjae shook his head, frustrated. Seonhwa had weird imaginations.

“JUNG DAEHYUN, YOU’RE GOING TO FUCKING JAIL!” She screamed and Youngjae immediately looked around him in case there were other people listening to her. But they were completely alone.

She wiped her runny nose, sniffling as she clutched at her chest.

“But it’s that kid.” She sobbed. “That fucking nice kid from Yongguk’s studio.”

Youngjae placed a hand on her shoulder, and squeezed. “Seonhwa, do you wanna go home?”

She ignored him, weeping profusely on the ground, her make up all ruined now, mascara and eyeliner running down on her face. “I... I am his _friend_.” She stated, grabbing Youngjae’s knee. “I am his fucking friend, Youngjae!”

“No, you’re drunk.” Youngjae simply replied.

“No! No! I am not!” She shook her head, but then wiped at her eyes. “Shit.” She cried.

Youngjae stared at her as she looked up at the sky, and then the ground. The back of her hand had already had black smudges, Youngjae noticed, and she was sniffling.

“Maybe I am.” She suddenly said in a low voice and Youngjae pursed his lips. “Maybe I am drunk.”

Her eyes found Youngjae’s and Youngjae found the pupils shaking with reflection of the stars, and there had been so many times he had to see Seonhwa shaken and hurting like that.

If there was one thing Youngjae knew well in relationships among themselves, it was; Seonhwa was a girl who had always had a hopeless crush on Daehyun. Daehyun might have noticed it, he might have not. But Seonhwa had always been there. They were friends since school after all, and if Seonhwa’s secret happy smile when Daehyun broke up with his dates didn’t mean she loved him then Youngjae didn’t know what else to think of it.

“I’ve always been drunk.” She muttered, sniffing and wiped her cheek with her wrist. “Drunk on the idea that no matter how many unsuccessful dates Daehyun gets, and how many one night stands he has, he’d realize that he had never found love. And he would return to the bar and find me. Comes to me.”

Youngjae pulled her close, letting her rest her head against his shoulder as he placed his chin on her head. He didn’t know how many times he had done the same thing for her for the same reason. He never kept count anyway.

“But he’s not looking for love anymore isn’t he?” She wept and Youngjae let her tears run through the material of his shirt. “Look at the way he fucking looks at that kid.”

“Seonhwa, you’re going to wake up tomorrow and regret everything you said to me.”

She didn’t say anything, merely crying quietly now. Youngjae pulled back a bit and moved in front of her.

“Climb up, I’m carrying you home.” He sighed, pulling her arms around his neck. And then he lifted her off the ground, piggybacking her easily since she was light, and somehow, it had been kind of a usual thing, carrying her on his back.

Once when she sprained her ankle in high school. Her first night getting drunk. Her heel broke on the way back from the bar. And then those countless nights of her getting drunk again, whether it was at parties or after hanging out at the bar.

Youngjae had gotten used to her. And he knew he wasn’t the only one. The others had their fair share of her drunken antics.

“I love you, Yoo Youngjae.” She mumbled against the back of his shoulder.

He smiled to himself, another thing he learned in relationship with his friends was that, whenever they get drunk they get all cheesy and mushy. Kissing each other’s cheeks and saying how much they love each other.

“I’m so glad I have high tolerance towards alcohol.”

 

 

 

Seonhwa woke up the next morning in a familiar bed. She blinked at the white ceiling above her, and looked at the posters of some sci fi movies and some singers on the walls.

She pulled herself up to sit and groaned as she felt her head throbbing. She knew she shouldn’t have drunk too much and now she was suffering from hangover.

She slipped out of the bed, pulling at her messy hair as she walked out of the room.

“Thanks for letting me crash.” She said and winced at her head pounding with every sound she made and heard.

Youngjae was in the kitchen, cooking up breakfast. “Stay for breakfast.” He said over his shoulder and she sat at the table, head in her hands.

“Ugh, I hate hangovers.” She groaned.

Youngjae opened the fridge and poured apple juice into a glass and gave it to her. “Then you shouldn’t have drunk all those alcohol last night.”

“But I didn’t...” her voice trailed off and her eyes grew wide. “What shit did I tell you last night?!”

Youngjae chuckled, taking the pan off the stove and placing the omelette onto a plate. “Does a ‘fucking high schooler’ and ‘Jung Daehyun you’re going to fucking jail’ sound familiar?”

She face palmed herself and pouted. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to. I mean, ugh.”

Youngjae looked at her and smiled slightly as he placed the plate onto the table. “You’ve said and done worse things when you’re drunk.”

She went red and she groaned, massaging her head. She drank her juice and started eating the omelette silently while Youngjae continued making his own breakfast.

The kitchen was filled with the sound of the heating pan, and a few vehicles on Sunday morning from outside for a moment before Youngjae spoke up.

“You know what turned you into that mess last night?” Youngjae asked, cracking an egg shell and letting the slimy egg pour down onto the pan with a hissing sound.

She stared at Youngjae’s back, her head propped on one hand.

“One thing you never noticed all these years is that,” Youngjae looked down at the cooking eggs. “You never told him about your feelings.”

Seonhwa was silent, staring at the way the white shirt Youngjae was wearing hung on his waist on one side, blue pants  she had seen him worn a million times before.

He flipped the eggs, saying nothing. Because he had nothing else to say. It was one thing he had wanted to tell her all these time, and he didn’t know why he chose that time of all the other times, why he didn’t tell her that before, why he had to tell her, why she couldn’t figure it out herself.

He turned the stove off, placing his omelette onto the plate with a spatula.

He placed it onto the table, sitting across her and taking a sip of his tea.

“You should consider washing your face before having breakfast.” He said, taking his ipad that was on the table to read the news as she rubbed her cheeks frantically, having remembered she cried the night before with full mascara and eyeliners.

 

 

 

Junhong held onto the door, finding Daehyun already in the kitchen and cooking breakfast from the sound of the clanking of kitchenware.

Junhong groaned, walking to the kitchen.

“You beat me into making breakfast.” He said, and Daehyun glanced at him from scrambling the eggs in the heated pan, smiling.

“Good morning, and I bet you would never be able to beat me in making breakfast.” Daehyun stirred the yellow eggs, listening to the sound of Junhong shuffling across the floor to take a seat at the dining table.

“Why not?” Junhong propped his chin on his hand, watching the way the older’s apron was tied behind his waist and his arms moved as he cooked and smiling to himself.

“You’re a hard one to wake up, Junnie.” Daehyun chuckled. “You’re worse than Himchan with a hangover.” He lifted the pan away from the fire and transferred the cooked eggs onto a plate.

“What? No way.”

Daehyun placed the plate onto the table and untied his apron, smiling down at Junhong. “I kissed you a million times and you never woke up, did you?”

Junhong turned red. “You could’ve called me or shaken me or something...” He mumbled as Daehyun took two mugs of hot tea and placing it onto the table before grabbing Junhong’s shoulder gently and kissing his forehead.

He sat opposite Junhong and drank his tea as Junhong took a fork and started eating his breakfast.

“Thanks for putting cheese in.” Junhong said, chewing and Daehyun grinned, liking how he knew exactly that Junhong would love it if he put cheese in his eggs.

“Finish up your food and freshen up.” Daehyun said. “I’ll walk you home.”

Junhong looked up from his eggs and Daehyun could have reached across the table and pull him into a kiss because he smiled with his mouth full.

 

 

 


	9. Mutual Standing

“So, I am going to tell her.” Junhong suddenly announced as they walked past the houses, not holding hands because a few people were out on the Sunday morning, and Junhong said he was embarrassed although he wanted Daehyun to hold his hand actually.

Daehyun looked at him. It just suddenly occurred to him how much he liked Junhong with the way Junhong let their shoulders brush as they walked, not minding the small collision and even pressing slightly against Daehyun. “Are you sure?”

Junhong looked at him, and smiled under the Sunday morning’s sunlight. “We’ve been dating for a month, I am ready.”

Daehyun returned his shining smile. “Do you want me to be there, when you tell her? I won’t mind.”

Junhong shook his head gently. “I can do it by myself. I want to face her alone. She’s been facing me by herself since dad left anyway. I think it’ll do the justice for her enduring the years of raising me alone.”

The older nodded, swelling with pride somehow, because Junhong was brave, and he somehow had been a coward, moving out of the house at the first sign of disapproval from his dad.

“But if it comes to the worst,” Junhong lowered his voice. “I don’t think I’ll regret it.”

“Why...?” Daehyun gazed at him, looking past the eyelashes, into the contemplating eyes. He knew how close Junhong was with his mom, it had always been the two of them as Junhong grew up, so Daehyun didn’t think he would be able to live with the fact that Junhong’s relationship with his mom might be ruined by the revelation from her son. He was her son’s boyfriend afer all.

“Because it isn’t her if she can’t accept the way I am.” Junhong looked ahead, squinting under the sun and Daehyun stared at him in awe.

How could he be the younger one?

“Junhong...” He took Junhong’s hand as they stopped walking, and after looking around him to make sure no one was close enough to notice, he kissed Junhong on the lips chastily. “I will always be there for you.” He said, squeezing the other’s hand to assure him.

Junhong smiled, not a trace of nervousness was found somehow, and Daehyun figured the boy could hide his emotions well when he had to.

“I’ll call you.” Junhong said, walking to the door as he waved, Daehyun waving back, yet worries were etched on his face so clearly.

And Daehyun watched until Junhong disappeared into the house before walking away, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his sweater, frowning in worries, his heart restless.

 

 

 

“I’m home.” Junhong said as he peeked into the kitchen where his mom was, washing the dishes at the sink.

“Hey, honey.” His mom greeted, looking over her shoulder and smiling. “Have you had your breakfast?”

“Yeah.” Junhong breathed, walking into the kitchen, and placing his hand on the counter. His heart beat faster at the thought of coming out to his mother at that moment.

She turned off the tap and wiped her hands on a towel, looking at him questioningly. “You have something to say just say it, honey.” She creased her forehead with a slightly amused smile, walking past him to reach for the glass she had taken out of the cupboard earlier. She knew Junhong too well. Although they spent less time with each other now that he was grown up and busy with his life, and her with her work, Junhong loved how they never grew apart at all. Not even once.

Junhong watched his mom tiptoeing to place the glass and took it from her, placing it there himself, albeit his hand shaking but he hoped she didn’t notice as he was closing the cupboard and she didn’t because she smiled gratefully.

“Are you gonna hang out with that friend of yours again?” She asked. “What’s his name? I’m sorry, I only know Jongup and have you been friends with this guy for a long time, because I am really sorry if I just knew about him I—”

Junhong laughed, his mom could go on about how sorry she was for not being involved in Junhong’s life and he thought it was cute while other kids probably hated the fact that their moms are so keen on involving themselves into their children’s lives. Maybe that was one of the perks having a young mom and being close to her.

She stared at her son amusedly, a hand resting on her hip now. “Whatever. Anyway,” She turned, tidying up some stuff on the kitchen. “You’re not going out again today are you?”

“No.” Junhong shook his head and raised his eyebrows at her as she pointed at him.

“Good, because your mom needs her son for dinner.” She smiled as she walked out of the kitchen.

“Are we going out for dinner?” He shouted as he heard her going up the stairs.

“Yes, honey and dress your best please!”

Junhong bit his lips, he could have said it right there then, but lost his chance. But it had been a while since they had dinner out together anyway, and he missed it, and he didn’t know if he could say it that night, out there in public, or he could delay it. No, he thought. Delaying it would only upset his mother, it was already late, one month into the relationship and he _had_ to tell his mom.

And so that night, as he sat in the car with his mom, gripping the seatbelt and tired from thinking the whole day on how to tell his mom, he figured it was either during the dinner, or after dinner, at home.

“You remember what I ordered last time we went here?” She asked as she took her hand bag after parking. “I really liked it and I think I’m gonna have that again tonight.”

Junhong looked at her and smiled softly. “Oh, yeah, it was good. The lobster, wasn’t it?”

She looked at him, thinking and nodded. “Yeah.”

They went out of the car, and when they stood beside each other round the car, she grabbed his hand to make him face her, immediately fixing his collar.

“Mom, do you have to?” He groaned, yet letting her fix his shirt and even his hair as he stood still, bending his legs a little so his mom could reach his hair as he chuckled.

“Of course I have to.” She smiled amusedly, patting his shoulder and they walked into the restaurant together.

Junhong let his mom talked to the waiter that greeted them about the reservation, while he clenched and unclenched his fists, knowing that he would tell his mom the truth that very night and he was really going to do it.

Living through something in the head wasn’t the same as real life, when you are really going to do something that you had rehearsed through in your head over and over again and he hoped she couldn’t see him being nervous and having a cold sweat at the thought of the truth coming out.

They followed the waiter to their table, his mom glancing at him to smile as they walked, in which he returned gladly yet nervously.

And when she stopped in front of their table, and the waiter left, Junhong raised his gaze from the floor, to be greeted by his mom’s own nervous smile, and a hand from a man who stood up at the sight of their arrival.

“You must be Junhong.” The man said, smiling widely as Junhong stared at him, not quite managing to make out what was happening.

“Yeah.” He let out, taking the man’s hand and the man shook it firmly and he was lost. Out of his head.

“I’m Kim Yeon Seok.” The man introduced himself, and Junhong nodded slowly, as the man invited them to sit down politely.

“Um, honey.” His mom called, and when he gazed at her, she still had her nervous smile on her face. “This is my friend I met through work.” She said carefully, glancing at the man and the man nodded at her, assuring, before both of them looked at the boy, awaiting his response.

Junhong couldn’t quite manage a smile as he clenched his fist under the table, wondering why he couldn’t hide his astonishment. He couldn’t even say a word, at the realization of who that man really was.

“Are you okay, honey?” His mom reached for his hand on the table, squeezing comfortingly. Her gaze was filled with worries, and hope.

The man seemed terrified at the blank expression on the boy’s face. “Do you need a drink? I’ll call the waiter—”

Junhong shook his head immediately, finally managing a small smile. “I’m fine.” He said, and his voice was too stiff, his lips too strained.

The man smiled at him gratefully, regaining himself after they ordered their meals. “I—I’ve been dying to meet you, Junhong.” He said and Junhong looked at him politely. “Your mom told me a lot about you.”

She managed a small laugh and when she caught her son’s gaze, she blinked, and Junhong knew what it was. Seek of approval.

The one thing he yearned for himself at the moment.

“I see.” Junhong replied, awkwardly pulling on his chair as he sat a bit straighter.

“So...” His mom looked at the two male at the table. “Um, he used to play soccer back in the days, honey.”

His mom tried, and Junhong couldn’t bear the thought of disappointing her.

“You play soccer in your school, don’t you?” Yeon Seok placed his hands together on the table, looking at the boy expectantly.

“Yeah, I love soccer.” Junhong felt like he was only managing. To talk, to smile, to eat, to breathe throughout the dinner.

It pulled at his heart to see the two before him exchanging glances and small smiles, it awfully made him feel bad about himself.

And the two talked, about some trivial stuff as Junhong forced a response every now and then to be polite, because he was not really there.

The food barely tasted like anything, he might as well have been eating cardboard, nothing felt like anything, and suddenly it was the end of the dinner, and he just couldn’t wait to get out of the place, he just wanted to go home.

“Well, it was nice meeting you,” The man said as Junhong dabbed on his lips with a napkin. “Junhong.”

He nodded, a strained smile offered and instantly stood up, walking out of the restaurant as he heard the sound of the legs of a chair dragging across the carpeted floor as his mom called his name.

And the air outside was chilly, and he bit his lips, not quite knowing what to feel, but it hurt. It hurt and he hated it.

“Honey, are you okay?”

Junhong turned to his mom, and he was an honest boy, had always been, especially with his mom. “No.” He almost screamed and she seemed concerned, reaching for his arm comfortingly as she guided him to the car.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry. I’ll take you home.”

It was unfair, for his mother the fact that he felt hurt. It was unfair to him, to that man in that restaurant who was probably worried about his mom. But he couldn’t help it.

He couldn’t help storming into the house and locking himself in his room because he wasn’t okay. He was a disappointment, and disappointed, in a way. Frustrated at the thought that he shouldn’t be doing that to his mom when he could hurt her more than she had ever hurt him.

“Will you be okay in there?” He heard her worried muffled voice from the door, and he rubbed his eyes, leaning against the bed.

When he didn’t answer, he could almost hear her sighing.

“Good night honey.” She said. “Sleep tight.”

But it was not a good night at all, it could have been worse, but it was all the same, and he couldn’t sleep, leaving the house early for school quietly, and wondering in agony whether his mom had not been able to sleep like he did.

“Make sure to eat at school since you didn’t have your breakfast at home.”

The text message from his mom was left not replied, as he buried his face into the fold of his arms on his desk, dreading the long day at school and algebra and compounds and telling his mom he was dating a guy, whatever subject that fell in anyway.

He had never hated the school bell at the end of the school session so much before, and he had made his way to Yongguk’s studio, where he danced particularly harder than usual, staying there longer after practice just to delay the moment he would have to come back to the house and face his mom. Who was probably just as nervous as he was.

And the dreaded moment came the moment he stood in front of the door, holding onto his schoolbag tightly, the sky dark as he entered the house, hoping she wasn’t home, and was still at work, but there she was, in the living room, standing up at the sight of her tall son entering and quickly making her way to him with creased forehead, eyebrows furrowed with concern.

“Oh, honey.” She whispered, pulling him into an embrace, tiptoeing as she stroked his pink hair. “I know, it’s sudden, I’m so sorry.”

Junhong didn’t say anything.

“I... I want you to be okay with it, that’s why I brought you there to meet him.”

“Mom,” he muttered and he felt her stiffening a little as he gently pushed her back. “Let me go please.”

She took a step back, fear in her eyes as she gazed up at him. “I’m so sorry Junhongie, but we’ve been seeing each other for a while, and you should know, I thought you should know, and you _should,_ I—”

He couldn’t hurt her, but he knew he would.

“—We were only seeking for your approval, honey. And yours only. You know I won’t leave you out on anything—”

It was unfair, because Junhong was a teenager, and he wanted to feel hurt, wanted to hate the fact that his mother was thinking of marrying a man just because maybe he thought his dad would come back, and resume his only memory of them playing soccer in the backyard, and he wanted to be that son who could yell at her for trying to be happy with another man besides his dad but he couldn’t.

What she was feeling, seeking was exactly the same as he was.

He understood her more than anyone ever could at the moment and he shouldn’t be hurt but he was.

“—I love you Junhong, I love you so much, and if you—”

Would she still love him after this?

“Mom.”

And she stopped talking abruptly, staring at him hard, hopefully with wide gleaming eyes. The only woman Junhong ever loved, and could ever love maybe, seemed so small before him, and he might break her with what he was going to say.

“I need to tell you something.”

She nodded hastily, thinking it was still about her and the man when it wasn’t anymore, and the person who could be in pain wasn’t Junhong anymore and it was her. “Go ahead, honey, tell me anything you want, I swear I’ll—”

“I like boys, mom.”

And the short sentence cut through her words, rendering the air to be still, and silent as they looked at one another, mother and son, blood related.

“H-honey... What...?” Her voice was barely a whisper, as the gleam in her eyes shook and he couldn’t take it.

“I like boys and I’m dating one.”

 

 


	10. Mother

Daehyun lay in his bed, looking at his phone. The text message sent to Junhong yesterday hadn’t been replied. He watched the screen go on, off and on and off again.

He figured the boy was too tired yesterday after arriving home since he had told Daehyun they were going for a dinner, Junhong and his mom. And he thought Junhong would text him the next morning, for anything, a simple good morning would do, but there wasn’t any and Daehyun was worried, maybe he had told his mom and something bad happened. Daehyun knew some stuff that could happen and had happened before and feared the worst for Junhong.

He wanted to call, but afraid that Junhong didn’t want to talk to him since he knew Junhong saw his text and didn’t bother replying.

He contemplated on going to his place, because he was worried as hell, and maybe he should.

He sat up on the bed, frowning to himself when the doorbell rang and he hoped it wasn’t any of his friends since he had to go out and check on Junhong.

He shuffled out of his bed, walking to the door without checking who it was through the peeping hole and immediately opening the door.

It shocked him to see Junhong standing there.

“Hyung.” Junhong almost whimpered, pulling him into a hug immediately, burying his head into Daehyun’s shoulder as the older searched for the words to say because he had no idea what happened.

“What happened, Junnie?” He asked softly, carefully wrapping his own arms around the boy and rubbing his back to sooth him of whatever that was upsetting him.

Junhong didn’t answer and he merely tightened his arms around the older, feeling the strong need to have someone to hold onto.

And Daehyun could barely breathe, the boy was taller than he was, after all and he asked again, softly and fearing the worst. “Did you tell her?”

Junhong pulled back a little, and Daehyun was glad he could see into the boy’s eyes now, as he cupped the other’s cheek, rubbing his thumb against the soft skin.

“I did.”

“What happened then?” Daehyun whispered, eyebrows furrowing as he saw how sad and upset Junhong looked, aware of the effect the boy had on him from just showing him his sad expression.

Junhong didn’t say anything, couldn’t, probably and Daehyun gently took his wrist, closing the door and leading him to the couch to seat him. He squeezed the younger’s shoulder, hesitating to ask anything out of the younger.

He gazed at the younger, all kinds of thoughts racing through his head. He could have been kicked out, disowned, hit or whatever bad things that could happen and Daehyun was growing crazy the longer it took Junhong to not say anything.

“Junhong, _please_ , tell me what happened.”

Junhong looked at him sadly. “I... I told her and she... she...”

 

 

 

Junhong couldn’t really say anything much after that. The truth was out. And his mom was silent, looking at him with concern.

What would his mom do?

Was she hurt? Hurt by the fact that Junhong, her only son was gay and had been dating a guy behind her back?

But they both understood each other the most with what they were going through at that moment, what was it going to do to everything between them?

“Honey...” She placed a hand on her forehead, looking away, and disappointed maybe. “I... I...”

She was lost, and Junhong was, the moment he found out he wasn’t normal, he didn’t really like looking at those girls with skirts, but he liked looking at boys with pants, and their Adam’s apples and their deep laughter rather than those cheery giggles. He wasn’t normal and he was crazy and he knew it.

And the moment he found out he knew he hated himself, but Daehyun was something else, magical, the saving grace and he was glad to have Daehyun in his life but all that was left was whether his mom accepted him having Daehyun.

“I—I don’t...” She placed a hand over her mouth, closing her eyes tightly for a moment, willing for no tears to spill out at the revelation. Or whatever words that would hurt her son.

Junhong looked at her, pleading for her to say something because it was killing him. He was dying. He couldn’t hurt her, but he did and there was no turning back.

He knew the only thing that was stopping her from saying anything was that she knew exactly how he felt. The approval they needed from each other.

Both of them just wanted to be happy with the person they were with.

And neither could say no to each other somehow because they knew the feelings very well, except Junhong was her son, and he was not like the other kids and he was not normal and a disappointment, he couldn’t take it. Not any longer.

She could have yelled at him and cursed him but she didn’t because he loved a man and so did she, which Junhong didn’t seem happy about.

So Junhong wasn’t willing to give her the chance she probably wasn’t going to take, silence was worse but it was all he received at that moment, and it was already taking away his life out of him so he ran out of the house, running to the only place he could seek comfort at a time like that, the only person who was a part of what was happening between him and his mom.

 

 

 

“Oh, love.” Daehyun murmured, pulling the younger into an embrace and kissing him on the head once because it pained him that Junhong was practically crushed in front of him.

“I was scared.” Junhong whimpered against his shirt. “She hates me and I was scared.”

Daehyun shushed him, rubbing his back because Junhong was just a boy after all. A terrified boy who was a little lost because he was a little different from other people.

“She’s your mom, she won’t hate you.” Daehyun whispered as Junhong pulled on his shirt, and Daehyun remembered his mom, the day he told his parents the truth. His mom never hated him, he believed, never would, only unwilling to accept his preference and they were just never the perfect match with each other. He knew because the last words she ever told him were ‘I love you’.

And it scared him that Junhong’s relationship with his mom would be ruined because of this. Seeing Junhong running to him the moment the truth came out made Daehyun feel terrified, terrified that Junhong wasn’t thinking straight, leaving his mom alone and going to his boyfriend instead.

“Yes she does.” Junhong protested. “Who wouldn’t hate the son who likes the same gender and is such a disappointment like me, when all she did all this time was raising me the best she could?”

Daehyun knew that feeling. That feeling of self hatred.

“She just couldn’t say anything because she’s dating this man, and she wants my approval.” Junhong muttered. “She introduced me to him when we had dinner last night, Hyung.”

The older listened, feeling Junhong loosening up a bit as he ran his hand along the younger’s spine.

“And it hurts that I know exactly how she feels.”

Daehyun pulled back gently, pressing his forehead against Junhong’s as he took the younger’s hands in his. His thumbs rubbing the other’s hands soothingly. “Junhong, you didn’t give her the chance to talk.” He murmured and Junhong merely stared at their hands which were on his lap. “She may tell you she doesn’t like it, and please, Junhong _please_ ,” Daehyun closed his eyes, fingers tightening around Junhong’s bony hands. “Don’t let it get to the two of you. If what it takes is for you to leave me then leave me, please, because she’s your mom, she’s the only one you have.”

Junhong stared at him, pulling his hand away slowly. “W-what...? I... I don’t...”

“Your mom is the most important person you have in your life now, Junhong. Don’t make yourself lose her.”

He could hear Junhong’s shaky breath.

“Look at me.” Junhong said, and it hurt so much to hear the pain in his voice. “Look at me, Hyung.”

Daehyun opened his eyes, and his heart wrenched at the sight of Junhong’s watery eyes.

“I can’t lose her, and I don’t want to lose you too.” Junhong shook his head, scared. “And... And leaving you won’t mean I will stop liking boys, and...” Junhong’s voice trailed off and he wiped his eyes. “ _I’m only telling her this because of you_.”

The older watched him as he tried his best to recompose himself. Junhong gazed at him, eyes shimmering and Junhong pulled him by the nape of his neck, giving him a brief kiss before pulling away reluctantly.

“I’ll talk to her tomorrow.” Junhong whispered.

And Daehyun knew how terrified he was the night they lay in bed as he held Junhong in his arms. He couldn’t help thinking that it might be the last time he could ever hold Junhong, and at the thought, he couldn’t even sleep. Let alone let go of Junhong in the morning.

 

 

 

The walk to Junhong’s place was silent, the morning was silent, maybe because it was early, but it gnawed at Daehyun’s heart, as he squeezed Junhong’s hand lightly.

“We’ll be fine.” Junhong suddenly said as the sight of his house appeared before them as they walked.

Daehyun looked at him, and managed a small smile, hesitantly letting go of Junhong’s hand as they stopped in front of the house.

Junhong gazed at him, and he seemed nervous so Daehyun reached for his shoulder, to give him a squeeze of comfort and strength maybe.

“Honey?”

Both of them turned to the opened door and the woman standing there, hugging herself. She looked like she had cried all night and barely slept from the look of it, and her expression was concerned, yet questioning as she looked at the two of them in the front yard of her house.

“Hey mom.” Junhong breathed, and Daehyun adored the way Junhong just stood there under the morning sky. He cared about Junhong so much that if it was the last time they could see each other, then so be it, if it meant saving Junhong’s mom from losing her son, like the mother living in the big house Daehyun once called home.

“Come in, honey.” She almost pleaded, wrinkles on her face so clear from all the years of being the only one who took care of Junhong.

Daehyun placed a hand on Junhong’s back, silently urging him to do as his mother said, and Junhong slowly walked towards her, after glancing at Daehyun for assurance.

She took Junhong’s arm as he walked up the steps, head lowered and she gazed at Daehyun.

Daehyun stared at her as she gently welcomed Junhong in, and she merely acknowledged him with a silent pressing of her lips in a tight line, and then Daehyun was only staring at a closed door.

 

 

 

Junhong watched his mom closing the door carefully and bit his lips. Words were eager to burst out of him, and he didn’t know where to start. Whether it was the part where he was happy with Daehyun, and he had accepted the fact that he liked boys or the part where he didn’t want to lose her no matter what happened, and he never meant to hurt her in any way but everything was a mess. He was scared.

“Mom, please—”

“Honey,” His mom cut off, looking at him with creased forehead. “before you say anything, please listen to me.”

Junhong stared at her, and chewed his lips as he nodded slowly. His mom pulled his hand so they could sit together on the couch, and her face was crestfallen and it was all Junhong’s fault and he hated himself at that moment.

She sighed, her hands holding onto Junhong’s two arms, as she searched for her start. “Honey, sweetie, I love you.” She paused, taking a deep breath. “I have to be honest... last night, I was shocked.” She sniffed. “But I wasn’t able to sleep last night because I was worried about you, and I stayed up thinking, that, if there was one thing I learned throughout the years raising you, and when your father left us, is that I just want you to be happy.”

Junhong’s eyes welled up with tears.

“And I... I don’t want to hurt you. Not again.” She shook her head. “Not after telling you that your dad left you years ago.” And tears streamed down her pale cheeks, remembering the pain of having to be the one to tell her son who sat in the backyard unmoving, waiting for the return of his dad to play soccer together. “God knows how much I love you.” She shut her eyes, more tears escaping as she sobbed. “And last night there I was, wanting to be happy with the man I love, seeking for your approval, and you,”

A bead of tear rolled down Junhong’s cheek and she reached to wipe it away, cupping his face with one hand.

“My baby.” She gazed at him adoringly. “You’re just like me, searching for happiness.”

“Mom, I’m sorry.” Tears burst out of his eyes and his heart hurt, the last thing he wanted to ever do was hurt his mom for all the right things she did for him, and that was exactly what he did the moment he found out he liked boys.

“No,” She retorted. “you’re my baby, and I want you to be happy.” She pulled him into her arms and he crumbled, sobbing painfully because this woman before him was too wonderful.

And he held onto her tightly, loving his mom more than he ever did, if that was even possible. And she kissed his head.

“Choi Junhong, I love you.” She whispered, stroking her son’s pink hair. “You dyed your hair all colors and I still love you. And I always will.”

Junhong smiled, wider than he ever had in his life and it was magical, how pain could be replaced instantly with soothing happiness instead. “I love you too, mom.”

She chuckled, pulling away to look at him proudly, her face beaming with joy. “Now, what’s his name, honey?”

Junhong wiped at his tears, laughing because he was such a baby. “Daehyun. Jung Daehyun.”

She smiled, nodding as she wiped the last of his tears lovingly. “Bring Daehyun over for dinner sometime okay? I want to get to know him too.”

Junhong was overwhelmed with happiness, squeezing his mom’s smaller hand tightly as he grinned. “And tell Yeon Seok to come over as well.”

She chuckled, crinkles beside her eyes, pulling him close to kiss his cheek. “Then it’s a double date with my baby boy.”

 

 


End file.
